All I want for Christmas is.....

Mostly, all I want for Christmas is this damn snow to stop falling and ruining my plans to host a party this evening. But, I guess that isn't what this post is really about.

So, via twitter (@PointClickDate follow me!) I have started to see there is a whole community of us single people writing about the trials, tribulations and hilarity that happens in dating life. In learning how to tweet and follow people, I started actually reading a lot of these great blogs. And then I stumbled upon Jeffreyplatts.com and I read this post: Wanna find love? Let go of the banana.

Are you keeping a few friends or acquaintances on your radar as potential hookups or relationship material?

Is your ex on your backup list?

These first two questions that open up Jeffrey Platts' blog entry made my stomach sink and I felt like a total idiot. I'm keeping both The Musician and The Ex around mostly for comfort. And yes, there is the argument that I am  not looking for love right now! I'm not looking to be in my next serious relationship. But let's be honest folks, eventually I will be and the longer I randomly text and hang out with The Musician and the longer I keep The Ex in the picture, the longer I'll be on the non-dating scene. And I'm starting to wonder what is out there. Maybe the reason I don't want a relationship is because I'm hanging around with guys who I don't want to have a relationship with.

So I  guess, all I want for Christmas to go back to single life and date new people. Unfortunately, I think this is easier said than done.

First matter of business, probably deleting The Musician's phone number out of my cell phone because I'm known to drunk-text him. Really, I just need to stop the random hookups with him because 1. they're not even that great, to be honest they're kind of boring 2. I'm the one who seeks out these random hook ups and remember what Kaitlin said months ago? I'm a league above The Musician and whether I really believe that or not I'm going to pretend that it's true in which case I should not be seeking him out, he should be seeking me out. It's embarrassing and I need to stop.

Not calling or texting The Musician easy, DONE and DONE. What's not so easy is having the conversation with The Ex to let him know we also need to be done. What makes it a little easier is I know he knows it's coming. We've hung out a bunch but I have been distant. He's even slept over and we have barely kissed or even cuddled. It's so hard because I do love him and I want us to work out because I know how good we were and how good we can be. Unfortunately, our last break up broke my heart no matter how much I tell myself it didn't. I'm not mad or angry but I can't pretend it didn't happen. And I think the only way I can really get over everything is to be away from him. Since we broke up, The Ex has never really been that far away. I think the most we went without talking was a week. I think I need some serious space, which I don't really know if I'm capable of doing but I have to try. Like Jeffrey Platts said, I need to let go of the banana! It's not going to be easy but it has to be done.

Well, my last few blog entries have been kind of somber, and I apologize. My dating life and my humor have been pretty non-existent making this blog really irrelevant. It looks though, dear readers, that with the New Year there will be new adventures and I'm sure there will have to be some funny things that happen! So, stay tuned!!!! And of course, I already have some people in mind to have new adventures with! The Nonprofiteer, The Actor, The Sailor and The Firefighter are all possible characters in the upcoming year!

And of course it wouldn't be Christmas without VIDEO CLIP TIME!! (Who doesn't like this Christmas song?? And also this is my favorite rendition of this song. This video was done in 2008 by A.R.T. Front of House staff A.K.A some of my favorite people in the world!!):

FAIL. EPIC FAIL.

Well, my grad class is officially over and I think I passed that! As for my personal life? Well, I'll let you all ultimately be the judge.

Since it's been 10 days (first fail, I can't even keep up with my own damn blog) I'll recap my last entry.  I've been debating whether or not to be single or not. And the struggle hasn't gotten any easier.

As I wrote in the last entry I was texting The Musician and I made plans to hang out after my last class. I didn't really think we'd hang out and I'm serious about this. I thought he'd forget and that would be that. Well, he didn't forget. He actually tried to plan a date, it was super awkward but I reminded him I had class and pretty much all I wanted to do was drink considering I had spent the last three days writing a paper.

We met at Tavern in the Square in Porter which is literally underneath where my class was located. And we actually had a really fun time. We laughed, we talked, we drank. He told me about his ex-girlfriend getting roofied once and then after his story, I stared at him and said, "Mmm, I don't think she was roofied." And he was like no, she did blah blah blah and I was still like, "Mmm, no, I'm not sure about that. Doesn't really sound like she got roofied to me." Sometimes, I'm a brat and I'm honest about that. And when he was clearly driving me home after the bar I thought oh shit, because I said his ex-girlfriend didn't get roofied he doesn't even want to make out with me anymore. But, as we drove to my apartment and then passed it, he asked "Is there parking around here?" UM WAY TO INVITE YOURSELF OVER MUSICIAN.

And I did call him out on it and that was funny, at least for me. So, we get to my apartment and head to my room. And then things got real awkward, real fast. He sat across the room from me until I was like why are you so far away? And then he sat at the end of my bed until I was like why are you still far away? Then he was close but still he made no move. We talked for literally a million hours and for a moment or two I thought, "I shouldn't sleep with him anyway because I'm confused about what I want and this will just make things more confusing. I will NOT make a move." But, then I quickly decided that was a DUMB idea and made a move. More because I wanted to make the whole night of talking worth it because really talking is for relationships and the whole point of hanging out with The Musician was to actively get away from a relationship. DUH.

On Tuesday, I was clearly interested in being single but in the same breath maybe I'm failing at being single too. I say this because for the rest of the week after my night with The Musician, the only person I saw was The Ex. He monopolized my weekend and I'm not sure how I feel about that. We had a lot of fun but how am I really supposed to know if being single is really what I want if I don't live my weekends or at least part of my weekends like a single girl?

I don't know. I just don't. I'm at a loss. Another fail.

Luckily, I'm not the only failure at life. To make myself feel better and to make you laugh I'm going to share with you a couple of messages I got on OKCupid that I'd call an EPIC, EPIC FAILURE:

Subject: You're Awesome
Message: You seem like an awesome girl. I like that you're into reading. I'm a huge early American history buff so I'm usually working on a good book. I also like the foods you have listed. I make amazing burritos. For me it's all about practice. My parents made them for us when I was young and I've been perfecting my technique from there. It would be fun to make them for you sometime. I'd love to get some ice cream with you (might be a little late for ice cream but we can try). Would you like to talk sometime?

Subject: The timing in tacos
Message:  So the eclectic nature in your banter made me think about of a good taco, and how much it's about good timing you want the taco hot and crisp, the lettuce fresh and the salsa picante even fresher. Rather random way to think of it , but 33 so I assume you count repeating the same task the remaining 66? I'd forget or leave things with friends that I'd go back and get. Has happened pretty much anyways, what countries have you visited?

What I really want to know is were these guys serious?! Did they really think I'd message them back? C'mon.

Even better though, VIDEO CLIP TIME!! And is THIS guy serious?? You're really in for a treat this week everyone:

To be single? Or not to be.....?

Now you all know that I started this blog after a major breakup with an ex who hasn't really ever left the picture. What you don't know is that I am a serial monogamist. Stop laughing, I'm quite serious.

I had my first "serious" boyfriend my junior year of high school when I was 15 years old. Serious is in quotes because I don't believe high school relationships can really be serious and it creeps me out a bit when people end up with their high school sweetheart without having some major 5-10 year break. Anyways, by no means was this boyfriend a sweetheart. He had his moments but what I remember most is him being a raging psycho. Anyway, we dated a little over a year and about a month after we ended things for good I entered my longest relationship. For the very end of my senior year of high school and for my entire college career I dated the same guy. For 4.5 years I had this extremely epic relationship that I wasn't really ready for. For most of the first 2 years it was long distance and then the last year we lived together. For most of the relationship we were either extremely happy or extremely miserable. Despite the really miserable moments, I seriously thought I was going to marry him and the thought of that makes me shudder. I'm still close with his family, it was that kind of serious relationship. And after that, I should have been single for a year or seven but only 4 months later I was with The Ex.

So, you see, I've never really, truly been single. I can't even count these last 4 months because The Ex has been so in and out. And the times when The Ex was not in the picture in the lat 4 months and I truly believed he wasn't coming back in, I was kind of terrified of being single. I was actually just getting used to being single when The Ex had the major meltdown after the Hot Jersey Guy drama weekend. What I wouldn't get into last entry was basically that The Ex ended up saying things to me that I had so badly wanted to hear for 2.5 years. The angry feminist in me said, "Too little, too late." And between sobs I did say this to The Ex when he confessed all these feelings -which were all feelings I suspected he had but never knew for certain. Letting it really marinate for about a week, the girl who only read/watched fairy tales and played with Barbie surfaced. And well, it's VIDEO CLIP TIME (WHY, WHY, was this song popular?):



Oh. The 90s!

Anyway, long story short, I'm not back with The Ex but we've been hanging out (and seriously just hanging out) and the possibility of getting back together is there. He's trying really hard, he wants me to be his girlfriend again and I have to keep reminding him I'm not. His efforts should be convincing or at the very least seen as sweet, but for some reason it feels really smothering.

The part of me that really loves him and always will, wants to forget about the last 4 months and go back to the relationship we had. But is that even doable? Not to mention the serial monogamist in me sees some real benefit of just being in a relationship and not having to worry about dating. Yet, this time around and the little time I have had being single has kind have been a lot of fun. It's be interesting meeting different people and not having any obligations. It's been liberating being able to be selfish and only have to think about my schedule. And yeah, it gets hard when you have an event to go to and you don't have anyone to bring or when you find yourself without plans on Friday and none of your friends can hang out last minute because they are with their boyfriend or girlfriend. But, I don't know, being single makes you really step back and figure out what it is that makes you happy regardless if there is someone special in your life or not. It also provides wonderful entertainment - I mean look at how wildly entertaining this blog is - all thanks to single life!

So, to be single or not to be? That's the question and it's a toss up. I really do feel torn despite my contradictory actions which include figuring out how to spend New Years Eve in NYC (and therefore a possibility of ringing in the New Year with... you get one guess) and two nights this weeks after a few glasses of wine I've texted The Musician - which is a whole other story, for a whole other blog entry, but let's just say we may or may not hang out next Tuesday.


There is much to think about, dear readers, which brings up another point. I feel an obligation to my readers around the world, yes, the WORLD (at least according to google)!! Thanks of course to my US readers but I have to give Canada, UK, Germany, Russia, Israel, Croatia and Denmark a special shout out: Thank you! Danke! Spasiba! Toda Raba! Hvala! Mange tak! And please keep reading!

Point. Click. Click. Click. Click......

I am sad to say that I haven't gone on a date with someone from OKCupid since November 8th -almost a month ago! Mostly I have been looking around on OKCupid, pointing, clicking and have been super unimpressed with the selection. To be fair, I haven't had much time to date because my November I was busy with The Musician, The Ex and Hot Jersey Guy.

To recap on those situations:
 
The Ex: It's too complicated, too personal and I just can't pull enough witty sentences together to tell you where everything landed after his drunken meltdown while Hot Jersey Guy was here. Just rest assured that it's quite messy and I don't know how to clean things up and if it's even worth trying. If you are confused by this, rest assured, you're not alone.

Hot Jersey Guy: Still hot. Still in Jersey.

The Musician: Well, if you remember, about a month ago I put The Musician on douchebag probation. And after careful consideration I have come to the conclusion that he's not a douchebag but he is just an ass. And so am I....

Although deep down I knew he was most likely not going to really try to pursue dating me or even communicate with me, I was actually stepping out of my skeptic shoes for a bit and was hopeful. And for about a two weeks I actually had reason to keep hope. We hung out before I left for New Orleans, he sent me a text while I was away that read: "Wish you were here tonight. Have fun in N.O" And yes, I found it creepy but I also saw the effort in that text and saw that to most it would be sweet. When I got back, we went on our first date ever and had fun, or at least I thought we did. We emailed back and forth for the next week. We texted over Thanksgiving. And then, nothing. Nothing. Just like that. And I really wish I could say I don't care but I do. And like last time, I really think it's mainly for pride reasons. I mean yeah, he's smart and attractive, blah, blah, blah but really why doesn't he think I'm super awesome? And why isn't he trying to date me?! What's worse is Kaitlin once told me I was totally out of his league. And I kind of think she's right because after further examination on The Musician's douche factor, I think he's really just a weird and a tad socially inept guy. And both of these personality traits are slightly charming and also maddening all at the same time. And therefore, he's an ass. And this hurts my pride big time that I can't even date an ass who is in a league below me! And now I find myself pointing and clicking on his facebook page because I am also an ass! And so is Mark Zuckerberg for creating facebook. DAMN YOU MARK ZUCKERBERG!!!!!!!!!!

Am I losing my touch? I've even been getting less OKCupid messages!

I don't think I'm losing my touch but I do think I'm a bit burnt out. The last four month have been filled with a lot of dating, a lot of guys and WAY too much drama. This on top of work being busy and being enrolled in a graduate class, it's been too much. I've been overeating, under-sleeping and well: I NEED A BREAK! So, dearest blog readers, I have decided to take a leave of absence from my dating adventures, finish up my grad class and do some soul searching. And without further ado VIDEO CLIP TIME: Ladies and Gentleman, give it up for Glenn Frey and the video styling of "Morty298":



Don't think I'm going to stop blogging though! First of all, I'm sure my "soul searching" will last less than two weeks because that's when my class is over and most likely when boredom will strike. Also, there's a few fun stories that have happened in the last four months that I have not shared with you. And please, you know you all come for the video clips anyway and there will be plenty of  those to go around! To prove this, to get in the mood for the holiday season AND because it never gets old VIDEO CLIP TIME UNA VEZ MáS:

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.......

The title of this entry pretty much sums up last weekend.

Looking back, I should have known better. I was being naive in thinking everything could just run smoothly. But hey, I was a little deceived as the The Ex waved the white flag on Friday night by buying me a burger and a beer and said to my face that he had overreacted and was okay with everything.

Saturday started well. Kaitlin and I got to Harvest Fest (where breweries from all over congregated to serve beer for 3.5 hours) before the huge crew of Jersey boys showed up. Kaitlin and I drank enough for her to be comfortable around 8-10 guys she didn't know and for me to ensure that I wasn't awkward around Hot Jersey Guy considering we only met once and had since only talked over facebook. Overall, Harvest Fest was fun and most importantly, drama free.

Things continued to be drama free as we went back to the apartment of the guy in the Jersey crew that now lives in Boston. We ate pizza, sobered up and then I got a lovely text message that read: "I hope you're having fun now because you won't later." Again, I should have taken this more seriously but showing it to my friend BK, who is also good friends with The Ex, and having him tell me not to worry about it, well, I didn't worry about it.

HUGE MISTAKE. I should have worried a lot about it because at the bar The Ex was very drunk and didn't hold back in making a scene. As The Ex showcased his extreme jealously the following was playing in my head VIDEO CLIP TIME!:


So, yeah that's how infuriating The Ex was being and just how terrible that hour at the bar was. Luckily, I kept my cool and was able to see the funny moments of that hour and I would like to highlight those 2 moments for you now:

1.  Hot Jersey Guy gets the name of my blog thanks to great friend and reader, Sean. So, if you're reading this Hot Jersey Guy: Sorta awkward but I hope you like the name I've given you and I still think it's very fitting. ;)
2. Some random guy places himself in the middle of the group I am with to order a beer. And after I catch him staring at me about 30 times in a pretty creepy way, I have to tell someone. So, I tell my friend BK who loves to jump at the opportunity to be tough (so sweet really). And all of a sudden the 2 of them are gone. Upon returning, BK decided its okay to introduce the creepy guy to me. And since I'm a polite girl, I shake his hand and as creepy guy holds my hand for one second too long, he asks "Can I speak to Katie without all these guys around." And without missing a beat Hot Jersey Guy says, "No." Creepy guys says, "Really." Really. And on that note, we leave the bar. In the cab to the next bar I find out that BK promised to introduce creepy guy to me because he bummed a cigarette off him. Wow. Good to know I can be pawned off for cigarettes. Ooooooh my life.

After leaving the bar, the terrible hour and The Ex behind, the night could really only get better. And dear blog readers, it sure did. Knowing that Hot Jersey Guy can and might possibly read this, I have to leave the rest of the night up to your lovely imaginations. But I will say, we decided to leave the bar and everyone else just before midnight, justifying it by all the day drinking we had done and to be perfectly honest, it was the best decision ever. Our night dramatically improved upon leaving everyone behind and heading home to Cambridge.

So, the weekend wasn't drama free as I was hoping but luckily, I found my way around it to have just the fun I was looking for.

Fun, less than 48 hour, drama-free, vacation fling!

Remember when you were younger and you went on summer vacations or maybe even summer camp? And in that trip you'd have a fun vacation romance? You'd spend day in and day out with someone who was so wonderful but only because you both subconsciously knew it had an expiration date? For those who don't know what I'm talking about: VIDEO CLIP TIME:



Aahhh sweet young, vacation love. Well, believe it or not, I resorted back to those good ole days when I was in New Orleans! I was down there on business but was able to add a bit of pleasure (in more ways than one: wink, wink) and stay throughout the weekend.

My co-worker's friend works for the Department of Energy and this is how we got the Secretary of Energy at our work event down in New Orleans. On site, the co-worker's friend made sure I did my job well (i.e get the Secretary in a t-shirt showcasing our organization's brand) and I made sure he did his job well (i.e make sure the event ran smoothly so the Secretary was happy). It was a purely professional work relationship Thursday morning but we found ourselves making out on a New Orleans street at 4am on Saturday morning.

I could go into the long details of this short fling but I'll break it down:

Thursday
2:00pm Got an email thanking me for my help on the event and let me know he was around for the next day so if I wanted to get a drink to let him know.

11:00pm He and 2 friends met up with me and 2 friends for some beers.

Friday
12:30am We make plans to get lunch at Commanders Palace and drink 25 cent martinis.

1:45pm 25 cent martinis and delicious, delicious lunch (I didn't realize we were on on a date until he paid).

5:00pm After a long lunch and a surprisingly great time we meet up with my friend Mary for drinks at The Columns .

6:30pm We part ways but make plans to meet up later.

Saturday
1:15am  He meets up with us at a bar which looks like someone's basement but mostly just exists for lots and lots of dancing.

2:15am After a few drinks, we both relax and the dancing begins.

4:00am He finally gets me to make out with him on some random New Orleans street. He asks if I thought it was a bad idea and I reply: "It's not a bad or good idea, it's not an idea at all." Because it wasn't it was a:

Fun, less than 48 hour, drama-free, vacation fling!

Then it was back to Boston, back to reality, back to the balancing act of boy drama......

The Musician seems to be stepping up his game as he texted me while I was away and took me on my first date last night!! He did end up leaving the planing up to me but hey, baby steps, baby steps.

I've decided to end things with The Animator. Unfortunately, I think I've done it the real passive aggressive, immature way by just not calling him..... I feel bad. He's so nice and I want to be into him but like Kaitlin said: "It's like being a little bit pregnant. You either are, or you're not."


Hot Jersey Guy is coming this weekend and I was really excited and I am still but there's a catch. Hot Jersey Guy happens to be friends with two people that The Ex and I are friends with. Soooo since The Ex is in Boston, the friends obviously want to hang out with both of us.  And I am dumb and about a month ago I said a stupid comment that went something like: "So BK is going to make a trip to Boston soon but we'll have to share his time because he has a hot friend." I know really, really dumb of me. It was one of those moments when I said it and immediately regretted it. I saw the words in my head and all of sudden they were being spoken and all I wanted to do was swallow them up. Anyway, I thought he'd forget about it because when does The Ex ever remember what I say?? Well, I guess he has a selective memory because that dumb sentence landed me in a whole mess of drama and The Ex flipping out on me. That being said, this weekend should be REAL interesting. And I was hoping to give Hot Jersey Guy a  fun, less than 48 hour, drama-free, vacation fling!  - there goes that plan. Well, I'll just have to think of Plan B: How to still have fun with Hot Jersey Guy without getting into a drama-friendly Jersey Shore Episode. Wish me luck!!

Surprise!

Friday night was finally here! Work has been insane so the weekend was much needed and a party to go to on Friday night made things even better! I left my apartment to meet Kaitlin and Scott at the party, hoping I wouldn't be first. Surprise! I was the first. And when I got inside Surprise! My yoga teacher was there and actually happened to be my friend Jake's (who's party it was and also happened to be my Senior Prom date and sometimes when, or every time I see him I remind him of this) roommate. And then because all good things, like surprises, come in the three... the following situation happened:

Finally, Kaitlin arrives with a bottle of wine to share! Hooray! Followed by Scott! Hooray! Followed by...... The Musician Hoor- wait? Apparently it didn't occur to Scott to let Kaitlin know, who could then let me know, that The Musician was coming. So, I had a quick "how do I run out of the room without him seeing me" moment and then calmed down and realized I had a voice and could say "Hi, how are you?" And then when I got an awkward reaction to this, I said, "Kaitlin! Let's go open that bottle of wine!" And then I ran out of the room and pretended he didn't see me.

And I planned on ignoring him because that seemed like the childish thing to do.

My plan was foiled when Kaitlin came back from having a cigarette with The Musician and said, "I need to tell you something."

Apparently, I was the one being awkward (half truth), I was always "angry" when we hung out (lie!), he called me all the time (HUGE FAT LIE). And I'm not sure if it was the stress of the week, the half of bottle of wine I drank or just my general distaste for lies and liars, but I decided that I needed to say something and I was going to do it right then. I stormed into the living room where everyone was playing Rock Band 3, went straight to The Musician and told him we needed to talk. And when he suggested to go in another room, I said no I can say it right here but when the room went quiet and I was clearly making a scene, going somewhere else to talk made sense.

We ended up going outside and I let him know how the month of us hanging out really went down. That he actually never called me, I actually was never mad about it but was just trying to figure out if he liked me or not in which I came to the conclusion that he didn't after he declined my Revolution game invitation and never invited me to do anything ever again (run on sentence!). He admitted he was a bad communicator and that us not talking anymore was probably mostly his fault. He also told me he did like me and gave me excuses as to why he totally dropped the ball. And I wanted to not believe him! And I wanted to call him and his excuses lame! I really did, but then he kept saying sorry and I told  him he didn't need to be sorry. And then he asked if I'd consider going on a date with him now....? If he initiated it... ? And then I gave in. And then we had nothing to say, so he commented on the awkward moment and then I felt there was no better way to solve an awkward moment than to make out. And I was right, it was then no longer awkward.

Flash forward to the next morning and The Musician is dropping me off at my apartment and I think to myself, "And just like that The Musician is back in the picture." Sigh......... If you didn't just think "stupid girl" you will now with.... VIDEO CLIP TIME (I love the 90s):





I immediately felt as if I needed to renounce my harsh words that I wrote about him in an earlier blog entry in which I wrote him out of this entire blog, but I don't want to renounce my renouncement in a later entry, so I will not take back my words yet. The Musician is on douchebag probation because it really could go either way. He could be even more of a douche than I even imagined and then jokes on me OR  maybe all his excuses that he said to me Friday night to explain why he was being such an idiot are REAL excuses, and maybe my initial instincts of him being really cool were right! Skeptical of the latter, of course. Also, he still needs to stop making fun of Scott but this MIGHT just be bad learned behavior coupled by Scott not ever sticking up for himself  - so maybe we can fix this?  Again, I'll have a better sense of this when The Musician is off probation, I'll let you know when that is/if that ever happens.

So, yeah. The Musician is back, The Ex is out and The Animator.... well we went on date number 5 last night. We just got a couple drinks at The Druid in Inman Square and I was bored. I think I'm going to blame this on The Musician. I wasn't bored before he showed up and now I'm all "The Animator is boring." But you know what The Animator does? He calls me, takes me out on dates and pays for things. I'm not sure The Musician really has it in him to do any of these things and then I wonder what the hell is wrong with me?! Why can't I just like the person I'm supposed to or should like? Ughhhhh. Anyway, at the end of the date, I gave The Animator a pity kiss and cursed myself for wanting to call The Musician. So instead I drank a glass of wine and texted him but he didn't respond until this morning and this led to all day texting, which led me to lead him to come up with the idea for us to hang out tonight. And here I am waiting for him to call and thinking it's not going to happen. I'm such a..... see video above.

Well, luckily, I'm going to be dating/boy drama free for the next 5 days because tomorrow I head to NEW ORLEANS!!! I'm going for work and then staying the weekend to spend some quality time with my friend Mary!

But have no fear readers, when I get back I have to figure out how to balance The Musician, The Animator AND.....


.........the Hot Guy from Jersey!!! It's official, he's coming up to Boston. SCORE.

Top 5 Highlights of the Last 9 Days

Forgive me dearest blog readers, it's been nine days since my last entry....

I 'd like to sum up the last nine days with five simple sentences:

1. Went on date number 4 with The Animator. 
2. Screamed at The Ex on the phone, called him a bastard and hung up.
3. Went to a Halloween party in Brighton as Tinkerbell and was hoping I'd meet a hot Peter Pan.
4. Found my 14 year old roots and developed a huge crush via facebook messages.
5. Went on a date with a new OKCupid guy: The Hipster. 

So, let's start at the beginning shall we?

1.  Wednesday, October 27th, 2010
For date number four, The Animator and I went to see The Social Network. I found it ironic that one, The Animator doesn't know my last name and can't find me on Facebook; and two, I used facebook to stalk him and found out his last name. Ohhhhh facebook - Thanks, Mark Zuckerberg! I liked the movie but movie dates are weird because you can't interact. And really that's all we did. He picked me up, we went to the movies, he drove me home and another awkward-outside-my-apartment-in-a-car-moment happened and that was that. I thought for SURE this time he wasn't going to call me. Like clockwork, however, after I got out of class on Tuesday night I got a text asking if I'd like to hang out again. So, I'm doing something right. Or maybe he's just really bored. Either way, I'll take it!


2.  Friday, October 28th, 2010
I was supposed to go to a party on Friday but it got canceled the day before. I didn't make new plans so I figured, I'll just hang out with The Ex. For the last few weeks he was kind of an on-call boyfriend. When I needed to have that comfort in my bed, I called him and he was there. When I had dates or other exciting plans, he was free for the evening. It worked out really well, for me at least.

Obviously this wasn't going to last forever but I thought I had a good month left. And then Friday, I called him and when he didn't come over I was angry. More angry because he said he would and then stood me up. And when I called to say "WTF?" He said it would be another 20 minutes. And when he stood me up for the 2nd time that night, I went to bed feeling like a fool. So when I got woken up by his phone call, I wasn't exactly "Little Miss Sunshine". In fact, I was "Lil Mizz Fuck Off". I told him we shouldn't talk anymore and when he put up no fight and simply just agreed, I flew off the handle, called him a bastard and hung up. And that was 6 days ago, we haven't spoken since.

I realize that this was all really dramatic of me and stems from a place of me not getting what I want. I see that. I'm not going to pretend I'm in the "right" here. However, I'm also not going to apologize or be the first one to reach out. If he cares about me at all, he'll figure out a way to talk to me. If not, well we all know that The Ex is an unhealthy habit, we've known it for weeks.


3.  Saturday, October 30th, 2010
Halloween Eve and a party in Brighton. I went with my friend Kaitlin to a Disney-Themed Halloween party and she wrote about the evening so beautifully in her own blog, that I'd be embarrassed to even try and do it better. Therefore,  click here to read about the wonderfully horrifying Halloween we had.

The only thing I will add is that I really thought that there might be some hot or remotely attractive guy dressed up as Peter Pan or Captain Hook, but to be honest I would have done much better if I was looking for a Wendy. It was definitely a female friendly party.

4.   October 11th - November 3rd, 2010
Now, I put this date range because this is how long I've been talking back and forth over FACEBOOK messages with the hot guy from New Jersey (If you just said who? Please refer to: Concrete Jungle). Anyway, yeah we've kept up through the amazing tool called facebook (even though I think you're even more of a douche after seeing The Social Network, thanks again Mark Zuckerberg!) And the 14 year old in me that used to develop crushes over AIM, effortlessly came back And it's ridiculous and hilarious all at the same time. But I have every intention of prolonging this crush until November 21st because he's supposedly making a Boston trip that weekend. If he doesn't come up, the 14 year old in me gets the boot and I get a crush that's more practical. Until then it's straight crushing... unless, of course, I meet someone crush worthy at the party that was canceled last week and rescheduled for tomorrow.

 5.  Wednesday November 3rd, 2010
Another guy, another date. This time I was actually kind of excited. He was really interesting through messages, he liked traveling, he had been to Japan, I was actually kind of impressed by his profile, his pictures were promising, etc. etc. etc. We met at my choice, Lord Hobo near Kendall Square.  And the second I walked in and saw him, I immediately was counting down the minutes until the end of the date. He wasn't ugly, although he definitely wasn't as cute as his photos, but he was The Hipster. Seriously, he was the poster child for Hipsters. And I just wasn't in the mood for his skinny jeans that were skinnier than mine, his plaid or his awkward attitude. He got really offended when I said downtown London looked like Epcot Center London. He said it wasn't London's fault that Disney world copied it, sorry I insulted the Hipster Mecca.

What this date did provide was some inspiration. It inspired me to look for hipster video clips and I am really impressed with VIDEO CLIP TIME this week! It's an Australian Honda commercial and it's quite amazing, enjoy: 

Death by Dating

Like I said last week, no juicy details to get into. Phew. Although, I had to be pretty slick or awkward - your choice- in order to get away with it!

Okay, I'm going to be honest: I AM SO SICK OF GOING ON DATES. No, really, last week I went on a date Sunday, Wednesday, Friday (if you count going out with the Ex a date) and Saturday. Not to mention that last week I had a work event Monday night, class on Tuesday and had to work at my part time gig at the A.R.T on Thursday night! In fact, yesterday I went home sick early but I really think I was just overtired. Beyond being tired, I think I'm gaining weight because all I do is drink alcohol and eat out. Finally, on Sunday I saw my girlfriends, Jess and Kaitlin, (yay for girls!) and they joked that I'd write two books, My Year of Dating followed by My Year of Dieting. It's funny now but I'm guessing 50 pounds in the future it won't be.

I'm sure you're all rolling your eyes and are sarcastically thinking, "Yeah, poor girl, she has TOO many dates to go on, I feel real bad for her." And you are right, there are some positives to all of this. Plus, I could stop at anytime - but then all of you would have nothing to read, and that's just not fair to you! The one huge positive of all this, and this may be obvious, is I get FREE dinner and drinks! On all dates with OKCupid guys, I've only had to buy once and I opted to buy. Not to mention it was only two beer for The Animator and me on our second date after he bought me three glasses of wine. So, yes, I'm really into the free beverages and food. Therefore, I've decided I need to be more creative in suggesting where to eat or meet up so that I can try new places I wouldn't try on my own dollar. That sounds terrible.

Anyway, the third date with The Animator went well! We had dinner at Green Street Grill in Central Square. And luckily, it was Wednesday and on Wednesdays at Green Street Grill is taco night! They were the most amazing tacos I've ever had! And we hung out for a while eating dinner and had a couple of drinks. And then at the end of the night, I played the “I'm really tired card”. I was all ready to take the train home, an excellent escape from having him come home with me, when he asked if I wanted a ride home. I knew it was risky to take the ride because there we'd be outside of my apartment in a car.... but I took the ride anyway - I had to! So, there we were in a car, outside of my apartment when he gave me a weird peck-on-the-lips-kiss and then there was an awkward moment in which I think I was supposed to invite him up, but obviously I didn't (I couldn't)! But, then I was weird and didn't get out of the car right away, so he gave me a real kiss and for a split second I thought maybe I should give it another go - and then immediately thought, "Nope, too soon!" and jumped out of the car and ran into my apartment.

I was actually just getting nervous that my running or fleeing – your choice – from his car made him less interested in me. But tonight he called. Remember the days when I would wait for The Musician to send me a shitty text message that would inevitably never come? Ah those were the days. Anyway, he called and tomorrow we have a date. I have to say The Animator is playing by the rule of three really wonderfully and is really doing well with the “don’t smother me but don’t think seeing me once every 10 days is cool either” balance. I’m starting to be slightly impressed.

My Friday date with the Ex was really great as well but I’m battling with whether this is hard or a "having my cake and eating it to" situation. It’s hard because when we’re with each other it’s fun and comfortable and sometimes I think why can’t we just make this work?! But the other side of me likes not having the commitment. I like that I can explore being with other people but the Ex can be the boyfriend when I want or need him to be. Gosh, that sounds terrible too. I’m changing subjects.

Next was the date with a new OKCupid guy – The Consultant. Okay, I’m not really sure he’s a consultant but I came to the conclusion that this was the easiest way to describe what he does. I'm not going to even get into it because it's too complicated. We went to this really cool restaurant in Inman Square called Trina’s Starlite Lounge. It looks like a dive bar on the outside, a chic restaurant/bar on the inside and the menus have a retro diner logos while the food is a new and delicious taste on American comfort food. They have to-die-for cocktails and the food was AMAZING. The Consultant was not bad himself either. He asked me a million questions about myself and did this thing where before I could finish a sentence he’d say “right”, which was kind of annoying actually but didn’t ruin the date. He was sweet, polite and even drove me home. No sparks flew, not that I was expecting them to but I haven’t heard from him since and that was on Saturday – although apply the three day rule and he’s got until tomorrow to make contact.

And that, in a nutshell, was my week. And SCORE, I was just inspired for VIDEO CLIP TIME:

Dates, Drinks and Discoveries

As I said last time, I had two dates lined up. The first was with The Animator and the second was with The Renaissance Man -thanks for the suggestions on the name everyone! I'm going to start with the date with The Renaissance Man because frankly, it’s less exciting and I don’t want to end on an anticlimactic note.

To be honest, I thought this guy just might be my soul mate – NOT because he said anything over OKCupid messages that made me think so, mostly because I had such an amazing Sunday. It started with sex (with the Ex… sigh) but regardless of who it was with, this is always a good way to start the day. I got a good work out in, then the rest of the day was lazy yet productive. I watched bad Ben Stiller movies, I ate pie with my roommates who I never see, I got laundry and homework done, I made a trip to Target, I played Rock Band for the first time with my roommate and when I was going to be super late for my date with The Renaissance Man, I ended up seeing my friend in transit who gave me a ride! The day was just going so well, I kind of thought, “because this day is so awesome, this guy must be so awesome.” Well, he wasn’t awesome. He wasn’t lame, don’t get me wrong, but my awesome Sunday had high expectations and unfortunately, he didn’t make the cut.


Before I go any further, I need to admit something. I’m not really proud of it but at 5 foot 2 inches tall, I am a height snob. I know, I know! Where do I get off? I mean I’ve dated, and dated seriously, not so tall guys. But ever since I dated the Ex who is 6 feet tall, I’m really liking the tall guys, and the short guys – not so much. So for all the short guys out there – VIDEO CLIP TIME!

skee-lo - I wish i was a little bit taller
- Watch more Videos at Vodpod.

That being said, The Renaissance man comes waltzing into Border Café and the first thing I think, not really that tall. He wasn’t even short, I bet he was average, but the height snob in me said, “not tall enough.” Anyway, we sat down and I felt less distracted that he wasn’t as tall as I wished. I ordered a massive strawberry frozen margarita, which if you’re from the Boston area and have never gotten one from Border Café, stop reading and go there now! We talked about everything - where he grew up (California), where I grew up, what he did in college, what I did in college, he was on a Triathlon team (I had no idea there were Triathlon teams), I played sports for a little while, he has almost played every sport known to man, etc. etc. etc. I mean really in two hours we learned quite a bit about each other. And he was nice and cute, but I left the date feeling he was interesting but I, unfortunately, was not interested. What stinks about this whole OKCupid thing is I’m pretty sure you can't just be friends with people you meet. It’s implied that everyone wants a little action no matter what they say they are “looking for" in their profiles. I wonder if I could successfully make a friend on OKCupid with a guy…skeptical, of course.


Oh man, NOW what you’ve ALL been waiting for….

DATE NUMBER TWO WITH THE ANIMATOR!


On Friday night, we met at The Sevens in Beacon Hill. It was your average pub but we got a cute corner table by the window. After three glasses of wine, and I think he had four Octoberfests, I’m pretty sure we were both a little tipsy. But, we were actually having a lot of fun. He was much more relaxed and the conversation was way less awkward than date number one. He was way more funny and we were having a really great time. We should have went home after all that wine and beer but we decided to go to the Red Hat for one more drink. When we both finished our drink we knew that neither of us needed another one but we didn’t know whether to end the date or what. He actually joked, “Well, we could go find a side street to make out in.” I’m not sure why I love when guys just say out loud that they want to make out with me but I do. Remember, this JUST happened to me in New York with the hot guy from Jersey. Anyway, I find it refreshing when people just outwardly say something about making because obviously we've both been thinking about it, so why not just say it out loud. I laughed at his make out suggestion, but I think he didn’t know how if was I laughing because I thought it was a terrible idea or laughing because he said it. Anyway, we decided to call it a night.


We walked to government center and realized we might have missed the last train – we had no idea it was that late. In trying to decide to either see if we should see if there was more train for us to take or find a cab, I stared up at him (he’s a good foot taller than me – score!) and then we kissed! Right in front of the government center T Stop, super romantic - HA.


Then another "romantic" thing happened. He asked how we should get to our respective homes and I said, “Well, I could be super forward right now” and he told me to go for it, so I did. I asked him to come home with me. We got a cab and the next thing I know we were making out in my bed.


Now, you’re thinking wow, this is great. The Animator is tall, funny, good looking, clearly you liked making out with him! Well, I thought the same thing but since I’m a true and blue skeptic, I thought, "okay, what’s the catch?" Well, the catch is the enormous heat he’s packing, if you know what I mean.

I hate to divulge too many details about my sexual experiences because this is really just supposed to be about pointing, clicking and dating – sex is implied but it’s not the focus of this blog and besides I’m a classy lady (or try to be). But I have to say I was in awe when I felt what he was working with down there. And I say felt because seriously I didn't look at it, I was too scared. I had NO idea they came in that size. My friends who have run into this (huge) issue should have given me exact measurements, I felt so unprepared! So I did what any shocked girl would do- I pretended I was more drunk than I was and just kind of stopped all physical activities.

Luckily, he didn't think it was weird and we have another date tonight. I'm going to try my hardest not to think about this (huge) issue. We'll just have to see what happens but this new discovery makes me very, very nervous! Rest assured, my next entry about date number three will not go into juicy details because there will be no juicy details to disclose. I'm just not sure I can handle it. Sure, I've never been presented with the opportunity to really know if I can handle it or not, but seriously this thing was ginormous. Although, if I do get the courage to do something with it, all I'm saying is I better get some free rock band shit out of it, because by the way I'm obsessed with Rock Band now. So it's really fitting I'm seeing a guy who works for Rock Band. Rock on!

Concrete Jungle

My goal has been to write AT LEAST one entry per week. Unfortunately, I haven't been on any dates since last time because I was in NEW YORK! To recap my trip, let's just watch this video:



Yeah, that pretty much sums it up. I ran around the city visiting friends from Brooklyn to the Upper West side and everywhere in between. Although it wasn't a totally guy free weekend, my intentions were to spend quality time with my some of my best friends.

Not totally guy free? Well, I met a whole bunch of guys through friends on Friday night when I got in, and well, one in particular grabbed my attention. Again, as my intentions were to spend time with my friends who I haven't seen in a long time and not to hook up with anyone, I didn't pay too much attention to him except for sneaking peaks because seriously, he was pretty hot. Then my friend Stef kept saying I should talk to him because he was interested. "Say what?!" I thought. I'm still relatively blown away when hot guys are interested in me. I'd like to say it's because I'm humble and not insecure....

So we did talk, pretty much for the rest of the evening. We even ran away from the rest of the group to get pizza. It was so "New York." But when asked to go back to New Jersey, the good friend in me, not to mention the New Yorker in me (New Jersey- HA!) had to decline. And when he said, "And I don't even get to make out with you" I kind of fell in love.

Do I WISH, WISH WISH that I had made out with this hot guy: Yes. But the moral of this story is that guys are fun, especially if they are good looking, but my friends are ALWAYS more important. So, with a quick kiss, I said goodbye and jumped in the cab with my dearest friend, Erin. And I would have regretted any other decision. He may come up to Boston with a bunch of friends next month but until then....

I'm going on a date tonight! The second one with The Animator! And on Sunday, I believe I'm meeting up with a NEW OKCupid guy! We were supposed to meet up before I went to NYC and it didn't work out so, hopefully this time it will work out. I'm not sure exactly what to call him because he went to school for engineering, is working to be a personal trainer and seems super athletic. He's also going to school right now for the French Horn... so any suggestions on what to call Mr. Best All Around? Maybe that? Anyway, if you'd like to give me input on what his "blog name" should be, please leave me a comment!

Back to Pointing. Clicking and most importantly: DATING

With The Musician out of the picture and The Ex really needing to be as well, I've known that going out on more dates needs to happen, and apparently my readers have thought so as well. Two dedicated followers of this blog and good friends, Stef and Sean(who may be my only straight MALE reader - way to represent!), let me know that although my life/non-online dating shenanigans have been interesting and humorous, I need to get back to do the online dating part of this blog. Note taken and thankfully for the blog sake I can say applied!

I was really getting worried there for a moment. I was messaging back and forth with people and no one seemed to be inviting me out. I almost had to drop all standards and go out with a real terrible looking and/or quite possibly crazy person - YIKES! Luckily, standards have remained intact.

A few weeks ago, I was supposed to meet up with someone from OkCupid, The Animator, but it never worked out because of our conflicting schedules. So, one week ago I decided to let him know we never hung out and see what he said. And he very quickly set up a date and now I am home, reporting back from said date!!

The Location: Miracle of Science Bar... wait does that sound familiar? It should.... I went there with The Artist! This time, however, was a much different experience mostly because The Animator was way hotter than expected. His OkCupid pictures did NOT do him justice. At times I stopped listening because I thought about making out out with him...


The Animator was a little awkward though, but when I realized I could ask him almost any random question at all and he'd answer, the conversation went much smoother. Needless to say, I learned a good number of facts about him which I will share the top five with you now:

1. He is an animator for the video game company that makes ROCK BAND!

2. He met Yoko Ono while working on the Beatles version of Rock Band!!!! (I heart Yoko Ono!!!!!!!!)

3.  He has a RIDICULOUS blog and I probably shouldn't publicize it here but I have to. I'm giving you the facebook link http://www.facebook.com/trueamericandog Basically, he photoshops dogs or other animals into weird scenarios and gives it a headline. A very ridiculous spin on The Onion. Some entries are just ridiculous but a good amount are pretty funny.

4. His nickname at work is Horse and he wishes he could introduce himself as that because.....

5. He knows someone who introduces himself as PEACHES. Yeah. He knows a guy who goes by PEACHES.

Anyway, other than the awkward moments that happened a little more frequently than necessary - especially at the end when he walked me to the train and said, "Soooo you want to hang out again?" I said "Nah.... not really" and then laughed and I think he thought I was serious, so I quickly told him I'd love to -  I think the date was.... A SUCCESS!!

Mostly, I can't get over how hot he really was. And maybe this is all expectations. For example, I thought The Artist was going to be HOT and he was NOT so much. I  thought The Animator was going to be decent looking, at best, and since my expectations were low, I think I found him way hotter than he actually is! I'll reassess after our next date, which I really hope happens soon! I can say for certain he's a good looking fella with a good sense of humor. Two big positives.

I'm hoping this a sign for good things to come as I'm supposed to meet up with another OkCupid "friend" tomorrow! Also, I've been messaging back and forth for AWHILE with someone else on OkCupid, who is NOW my facebook friend and also we've found out that we have a mutual friend, so I'm not really sure what the hold up is but I'm hoping we'll meet up sometime soon as well.

Oh, and by "good things to come," I mean "good blog material." You thought this skeptic was getting soft on you, didn't you? HA! NOT YET!

And since I've also gotten feedback (which by the way please feel free to give me feedback, what you like, don't like, what you want more or less of, as a COMMENT. Feedback so far has been AMAZING!) that people LIKE the video clip element, I will leave you with the following:

The Musician Exits Stage Left

Well, readers (I’m acting like there is a lot of you – in hopes that some day there will be), I bet you were all on the edge of your seats last entry as I left you with the fact that I was a half a bottle of wine deep and extremely angered and confused by The Musician’s actions, or lack there of, the last time we saw each other. I also asked you all, “Should I call him?” And although I clearly stated at the very end of the last entry that I need to give up boys and bad decisions, I called him.



He picked me up and brought me back to his place. And since I was drunk, he decided he should be too. And we watched Modern Family, I cried laughing because how funny is that show?! Anyway, this sleepover was much more interesting than the last time. THANK GOD.


So, that was last Wednesday and it’s been a week and one day. The only communication we’ve had is through facebook. And it mostly consisted of him telling me that he wasn’t sure if he could go to the Revolution game I had invited him to on Saturday and then officially telling me he couldn’t go. Even though I told him a week an a half ago and he agreed to go. His excuse was musically related but the fact that he hasn’t called to hang out or schedule anything at all makes him very, very lame.


Now, you’re probably all thinking, oh no, he’s totally blowing her off and I bet she’s super upset because she was falling for him and oooh, how terrible. Well, I was disappointed a week ago when he was clearly blowing me off, a week before The Ex and I started having amazing sex. I’m not saying I didn’t think The Musician was really cool and someone I could really like, but let’s face it, he was my rebound. I didn’t want him to be! I don’t want him to be! But, he is or WAS.


I had an interesting night out on Saturday with The Ex, by the way. We drank too many margaritas (please don't call AA, I know a lot of this blog revolves around alcohol and drunkenness but really I'm okay) and danced our heart away at The Donkey Show. Before dancing though, I thought it would be a good idea to have the awkward “who have you slept with?” conversation. GOOD NEWS: We’re one for one. BAD NEWS: He slept with someone! Jerk. GOOD NEWS: It was only once (I win!) But upon, having this conversation I was outraged, I was hurt, I was jealous! Then I thought about if The Musician slept with someone else. I felt nothing, I felt like man, maybe I should have this conversation with him so I find out he IS sleeping with someone else and be like good go be her problem.


And this is where I write The Musician out of my blog (get the title now, theatre geeks?).


At the very beginning of all this I told you that Elizabeth Gilbert was going to be my guide through this and really I’ve mentioned Carrie Bradshaw way more. But, this is because Elizabeth Gilbert is way cooler than Carrie Bradshaw and I will ever be. I mean she went on an epic trip to Eat. PRAY and LOVE! I haven’t found too many similarities that I can really incorporate into this blog, until now. For those who haven’t read Ms. Gilbert’s book she goes to India to PRAY. I mean really pray. She’s literally mediating for hours on end every day. And one morning, all she can think about in her mediation is her ex-husband AND her ex-boyfriend (the guy after her husband AKA REBOUND). And she’s embarrassed – I’ll quote her “I mean- here I am in this sacred place of study in the middle of India, and all I can think about is my ex-boyfriend? What am I, in eighth grade?” Not only do I think this exact thought – the eighth grade part, because I have this odd boy crazed part of me, but yesterday in yoga, I went through the same thing. Usually yoga really gets me out of my head and into my body and that’s why I love it. But this yoga session, man all I could think about was The Ex and The Musician. But then, something wonderful happened to me. And Elizabeth Gilbert goes through epiphanies in the book too, and I haven’t gotten that far in it because I started a graduate class, which requires a million of pages of reading per week so I don’t know if she makes an epiphany about her ex and her rebound but…. here is my epiphany:


The Musician is a DOUCHEBAG. I’m not sure if it’s intentional or not but he’s a DOUCHEBAG. Not only because he blatantly ignored my date request or only has really called me once in the month we've been "hanging out" and has left the making plans entirely up to me but I’ve also noticed he’s a shitty friend and is just overall wasted talent and potential. I call him a shitty friend because I met him through my friend Kaitlin, who met him though her best guy friend, Scott. Now Scott is one of the most amazing people you will ever meet. He’s completely and utterly awkward, but he’s genuine, thoughtful and I’ve decided we need to be really good friends as well. Anyway, to be mean to Scott would be like being mean to your Grandpa – inappropriate and really weird. However, The Musician is mean to him, like straight up bully mean. Kaitlin and I had a long talk about this and decided it was because The Musician is totally jealous. Scott’s got his head on straight and is going down a great path to success. The Musician, on the other hand, smart, good-looking, extremely talented musician and composer, has no real path. He’s working part time at Bay Sate College so he can “focus” on his music the other 4 days of the week but he’s not really doing that all. He’s also working on super esoteric work that’s super specific and I'm not sure how he ever really expects to make a career out of that, nor does he. He has no plan and from my observation no work ethic. Therefore, his intelligence, good looks and musical talent are such a waste. WHAT A SHAME. I care, but not too much, because like I said before: He’s a DOUCHEBAG.


The other part of my epiphany is funny and heart wrenching all at the same time. Here goes: I truly and honestly believe that The Ex and I will ultimately end up together. I’m not saying we’ll get married, I mean maybe, but not necessarily. In fact, I could see myself having a really wonderful and happy marriage – children even - with someone else! And we could be happy for many years, but then at some point for better or worse, my husband and I will part ways and I will end up with The Ex. And maybe this is ridiculous and I’ll look back at this at the end of my life and laugh at how silly I was. But, I don’t know, during this crazy yoga session, I started to stress about him and the minor detail that I forgot to mention that he’s probably not going to California anymore. And then I heard myself say, “Katie, relax. Stop trying to control everything and just let go (FIGHT CLUB reference, my psyche is awesome – VIDEO CLIP TIME BELOW) be with him, don’t be with him, it doesn’t matter, in the end, when it's right, you’ll be with him, don't worry." And I’m not going to get into all the details of why I really believe this but I do. And whether it’s true or not, happens or doesn’t, for now it gives me some comfort.


VIDEO CLIP, as promised:

"Just Let Go" from Rock Sexton on Vimeo.

So thank you, Elizabeth Gilbert, for giving me permission to think about boys during yoga!! And another special thanks to you, Musician, for being a character in the blog but your douchery has over stayed it’s welcomed, and it’s time for you to exit stage left in order for someone else to enter stage right…

Bad Life Decisions

Last entry, I introduced the phrase “bad life decision.” Well, this seems to be the phase I’m going through in my life right now. You might have noticed this already, however, like when I let The Musician come over in the middle of the night or when I not only went over to the The Musician’s in the middle of the night but I HITCHHIKED. Yea. I’m not making good life decisions, but I can say that I'm having a hell of a lot of fun. And as my wise friend Kaitlin told me “if you never make a bad decision you're super boring, and no one wants to be boring! So here's to being interesting!” Cheers, Kaitlin, Cheers.

So, I ended with the last entry with a “teaser.” Drunk at 11:00pm, I thought it was a good idea to call The Ex-Boyfriend. Well, he didn’t pick up, PHEW.

Of course, that’s not where the story ends. He calls me the next night while I’m in the movies. He’s been in California, interviewing for jobs. I get the voicemail after I get out of the movie and THANK GOD I was with Kaitlin. If I had been on a date, this would have been super awkward. I listen to the message and he tells me he got a job and is moving to California. And all of a sudden, I’m not okay. And then, I’m crying. And then, I need wine. I don’t know what came over me but I couldn’t handle the idea of him being across the country. I talked to my friend, Liz, the next day and she made sense of it for me. There is a comfort in having him nearby – even if I never hang out with him, I can if I want! Having him in California, I can’t see him on a whim. Also, it finalizes the breakup. When he leaves, it’s over, for good. It slams the last 2.5 years of my life shut.

We played a great game of phone tag and then the next day after I was full of brunch and mimosas, he calls me. We catch up. I tell him how my class went (I’m taking a class! I thought it would help with my boy obsession – it’s not helping, at least not yet but I’ve only had 2 classes) and he told me about his job. And we made plans to hang out later in the week when he was back.

About a half hour later, he calls me back asking for an odd request. My heart sinks into my stomach and I have no idea what he is going to ask. He asks if he can stay over sometime in the week. I immediately don’t know what to say. Something inside me is like OF COURSE but the rational part is like FUCK YOU. I tell him I have to think about it and for him to call me when he gets back.

He took this very literally. He called me at 7:45am when he landed. And he asks me not only if he can sleepover that night but the entire week. And when he asks again, if he can sleepover that at least tonight, one night, I say: I guess. Because that’s what I say when I mean yes but know that I should say no….

And he does sleep over that night, which is Monday. And he sleeps over Tuesday and Thursday. And all I am going to say about it is: Why the hell is post-breakup sex SO amazing? Yeah. So, I had a pretty good Monday, Tuesday and Thursday.

And the only way I can explain my bad life decision is really lame –especially because this will be my SECOND Sex & the City reference – but here I go:

My whole relationship with The Ex-Boy Friend has been breaking up and then coming back together. And all I can compare it to is…. Get ready here is the lameness that is me: Carrie and Big. But, I'm serious. No matter how many times Big is an asshole she ALWAYS goes back to him, and you sit there shouting at the damn TV "ARE YOU AN IDIOT CARRIE BRADSHAW?" And she is, and so am I, but we have the inability to say no to this one guy... Well, in Sex & the City, Big moves to Nappa – VIDEO CLIP TIME:




Anyway, I guess this is the part when The Ex-Boyfriend moves to California. So, maybe this means I'll meet a really old Russian man and fall in love. But, don't worry I don't think I'll move to Paris and have to be rescued by The Ex. That's just silly.

In reality, I know that sleeping with him this last week is just my way of saying goodbye for good. When he leaves for CA, it’s over, it’s done. Besides, it's pretty hard to keep accidentally hooking up and dragging things on when someone is across the country, 3 hours behind you... The Ex-Boyfriend will literally and figuratively be in the past.

That’s if he actually goes. It’s a week later when I’m writing all of this and well he hasn’t gotten the official offer. Sigh.

To back track a bit, the Musician had a party. I acted very awkward because we hadn’t seen each other in 10 days and in the last 4 days I’d been busy or at least getting busy with The Ex. I didn’t even know if he was still interested even though I did get an invite to his party. When my friends were leaving, I straight up asked him: Do you want me to stay? And when he said yes, I stayed. And drank. A LOT. And slept over, and stuff happened, and we got brunch the next day. And he holds my hand and it’s cute.

And then that night I go on a date with The Ex. And I wake up the next morning in a terrible mood. Extremely ready to tell The Ex AND The Musician that I want nothing to do with him. Neither of these relationships are good decisions or going anywhere. What the hell is ht point?? Instead, I ask The Musician to hang out with me. And he comes over,  we hang out and asks if he’s allowed to sleep over (if one more guy asks me to sleep over, I swear). And he sleeps over, however, he doesn’t even attempt to kiss me. Not ONE physical thing happens between the two of us. Leaving me confused, a bit ticked off and did I mention confused. Did he really think I just wanted to hang out and talk? What does he want? I've been drinking wine while writing this entry, should I call him and ask?

Boys, bad life decisions – too bad it’s not lent or that I'm a practicing Catholic, I really need to give both up for AT LEAST 40 days.

Drinks with The Artist

Remember I messaged The Artist? He drew giraffes, I thought he cute, I was being proactive and then he messaged me back? Well, I mentioned him in the 3^rd entry – go back and reread if you don’t remember.

So, all this time while I was having a lot of fun making bad life decisions like hitchhiking, sleeping with The Musician without having a real date(oh yeah it happened again, we haven’t gone an official date yet, this is considered a BAD LIFE DECISION) and getting stalked by The Scientist - through all that - The Artist and I have been messaging back and forth. For a while, I really thought that we would just be OKCupid message pals forever. I mean everyone else on this site was very forward asking for numbers, giving me a number, asking if I wanted to a get a drink in the first message and today, I even got a message asking if I’d be interested in an “adult romp” this weekend. So, sending long messages back and forth with The Artist was definitely different. That being said, he seemed like a nice, decent guy (and hey, his photos aren’t so bad either) so when he finally asked to meet up, I was obviously in!

We decided to meet up in Central Square at 7pm for drinks. I thought this was smart keeping it casual, if I wanted to bail after one drink I totally could have! So, I’m 10 minutes late AGAIN, really I don’t know what my problem is. When I see him for the first time I giggle to myself because he wore a skinny little tie! Super adorable. This time no hug like we know each other because that’s actually weird. He buys me my first drink (so far, so good) and we sit down and chat it up. And he’s nice and kind of cute but man, he’s awkward. No, that’s not fair to say because HE'S trying harder than ME to keep the conversation flowing and moving forward. All I can think he’s a SUPER GEEK. In fact, he reminds me a little of Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory. For those of you who aren't familiar with this show:

 

And just like Sheldon, even though he’s a super nerd, you like him because he’s quirky and funny. And The Artist isn’t laugh out loud funny but just like in the clip above, he comes out of left field with his topics. For example, we were at an awkward pause in conversation when he says, “So, my sister is dating a Private Eye.” First of all this is the coolest thing I’ve ever heard. I want to be a Private Eye! How do you get to become a Private Eye? Do you go to school to become a Private Eye? Apparently, his sister’s boyfriend just showed up at an office and trained to become one. SO COOL. New life goal: Become a Private Eye.

The Artist then goes on to tell me all about his sister. In fact, I think I left knowing more about his sister than him. But seriously, I want to be his sister’s friend, she sounds super cool. She was an amazing dancer and got into an awesome dance program but THEN tragically her legs or knees or her shins or something started to bother her. She rested, thought it would get better but ALAS!! This problem did NOT go away! And now she will never have a career as a dancer! She was left with crushed dreams, an unknown future and aching limbs! But she perseveres! She starts to go to school somewhere else and now has a NEW dream! To be come an archeologist! And now she’s dating a Private I. What a cool chick. Not really sure why The Artist is such a nerd.

He’s such a nerd in fact, that I decide we need to change locations and what better place to go but to the Miracle of Science Bar. With a periodic table in the background, I seem to not care as much about his nerdiness. Or maybe I'm getting a bit tipsy.

And he buys my 3^rd drink and as I finish the last few sip, I realize I'm drunk - not that I can tolerate my alcohol anyway, but to my credit, I had a small salad for dinner and a few pumpernickel pretzels. I'm not just drunk but I'm starving! And I wonder, am I just drunk or does he give off an incredible gay vibe??? Oh brother, it’s not even 11pm, I’m drunk and now he seems a little gay to me. I decide to make a good life decision (you know to switch it up), tell him I’m tired and go home.

On the walk to the train station, he hits me with another random but hilarious fact: If I have a child who is a hemophiliac, I may get a book with his drawings in it. Ooooh Artist, you’re such a quirky, silly nerd with a splash of gay thrown in!

We do the awkward hug, he thanks me for coming out and we part ways. And guess what? THREE DAYS later he messages me. Too bad he gives me a nerdy, gay vibe because the boy at least knows how to play by the rules. But, since he’s playing by the rules, I let him know I’m busy but to call me in a week when things are less hectic. All and all it was okay time and thank God he's not giving the stalker vibe. Really, I'm not sure I can handle another stalker quite yet.

TEASER TIME: On the way home from drinks with The Artist, it’s just now 11:00pm and as I said before I’m drunk. In my intoxicated state, I think, who can I drunk dial. The Musician? You would think that but no, he’s away, so it’s not like calling him would do anything. The Scientist? WRONG. Come on, who drunk dials, let alone calls, a stalker. So, who??? I drunk dial…


THE EX-BOYFRIEND.

Stay tuned…

From Scientist to Stalker in One Too Many Texts

Let’s recap a bit shall we? The Scientist and I went on ONE date and ONE date only. I had a mediocre time but thought maybe I’d give him a second chance. Upon arriving home after our date - meaning within the hour after our date was over – he texts me (TEXT NUMBER ONE) telling me how great a time he had and that we should hang out soon. “Soon” – this is the red flag that I ignored. Now I will give you a play by play of the text messages he sent after this day (The date and the “soon” text message were on a Saturday):

SUNDAY: He behaves himself and doesn’t contact me on Sunday.

MONDAY: I told him I was moving on Monday. Mid-afternoon he sends me TEXT NUMBER TWO, asking me how my move went. Well, since I wasn’t moving that evening, it hasn’t happened yet, I tell him this. Later that evening, TEXT NUMBER THREE, how did the move go?? I ignore it.

TUESDAY: I’m sick, running around buying paint and moving the last piece of furniture into my apartment. TEXT NUMBER FOUR: Are you done moving? Do you want to hang out? I tell him I’m sick, I won’t be done getting my apartment set up until Thursday and then I go away Friday so I’m not sure I’ll be around until the following week. He sends me a text back - TEXT NUMBER FIVE- asking when I’ll be home. Not until Tuesday, I lie.

WEDNESDAY: TEXT NUMBER SIX – asking me how the painting is going. Seriously, Scientist, I’m starting not to be able to breathe.

THURSDAY: TEXT NUMBER SEVEN – asking me how work is. VOICEMAIL at 5:15PM “Hey Katie, What’s up, it’s me (it’s me?? Yes, I know my phone tells me it’s you but I don’t know you well enough for you to say “it’s me – this really bothers me, probably more than it should). I was just wondering what you are up to, seeing if you are still sick and if you’re done moving and everything. I duno. Mumble,mumble. Hope work went well today, give me a call when you get this.” Later that evening, maybe an hour or so later, TEXT NUMBER EIGHT: What’s up? He calls AGAIN around 10pm that I get when I’m out at a gallery show opening with The Musician and my friend Kaitlin. Although it’s rude to The Musician, I shove my phone in Kaitlin’s face and scream STALKER. She laughs – not funny Kaitlin! Ok, yeah, it is pretty funny.

FRIDAY: I’m officially away in Milwaukee. He sends me TEXT NUMBER NINE AND TEN. One is a picture of some fat lady at a concert that everyone is staring in horror at. The other is apologizing; he meant to send that to someone else. YEA maybe if you didn’t text me so much you wouldn’t have by accidently sent this inappropriate photo to me. I don’t text him that, I just ignore him.

SATURDAY – MONDAY: FREEDOM

TUEDAY: 8:15AM TEXT NUMBER ELEVEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, those many exclamations points are necessary. If I told him I was coming back from Milwaukee on Tuesday, why the FUCK (Yes, this fuck is necessary) would I be home at 8:15am?? That means my flight would have been at 5:15am. Hello? Common sense anyone? The fact that I actually came in the night before, have the day off and I’m SLEEPING IN, this pisses me off even MORE that he’s texting me at 8:15AM!!! Congratulations, Scientist, you have just been promoted to STALKER. So, the text message says: Hey. Are u back? How was your trip? I wake up to this stupid text message, throw my phone across my room and go back to bed.

10:09 AM: TEXT NUMBER TWELVE: “Ok well I guess you’re ignoring me. I had a good time with you I thought you did too but if you don’t want to see me again that’s fine but that’s a pretty immature way of sending a message.”

All I can say is WOW, get confused why he doesn’t use any punctuation and then copy and paste this into an email to Kaitlin. I want to just ignore him but I have to let him know how much of a crazy person he is. Therefore, 40 minutes later at 10:49am, I respond: “Wow. I’m still away [LIE]. I told you I’d talk to you when I got back. But all your texts are a little much and I think it’d be best if we didn’t hang out again.”

He responds pretty much less than a minute later, TEXT NUMBER THIRTEEN “Hmm sorry I’m just a little insecure… [Really? I hadn’t noticed at all thanks for clearing that up Stalker] all I sent were 3 texts [3? Try 12, 13 if you count this one] but hadn’t heard back in 5 days… ok if u feel that way

And just like that my first OKCupid inspired relationship is over. And you think that’s where it would end right?? Well, this morning (2 weeks after the first date) I log in to OKCupid find a message from The Stalker sent late Friday night (3 days after the thirteenth text)! Seriously, people, I could not make this shit up!

“hey I’m not usually the person who first admits they’re wrong but I’m sorry for acting like such a psycho I don’t blame you for not wanting to see me again after I sent you that crazy text. It’s a long story but my ex left me with some serious trust issues. I shouldn’t have let it get to me and done this to you.”

I’m not sure what my favorite part of this message is. Is it the fact that he admits he was a psycho? Is it the fact he still isn’t using punctuation? Or is it the part where he tells me he has trust issues? I think it may be the trust issues part because what does his trust issues have to do with me? We went on A date, ONE date. UNO. UN. Did he think that meant that we were exclusive? And that we needed to talk every day and that my not responding his every dumb text message was me betraying his trust?!? If so, that’s hilarious.

All I can say, is I’m glad he knows he’s crazy. Unfortunately, I don’t have time for crazy.

And in the morning it’s “BOYS”, cause in the evening it’s “BOYS”

 For the title of this I was inspired by Beastie Boys "Girls" just listen to this song and every time they say "girls" input "boys" and that's where I am with this blog.

It all started at 2:30am on the last Saturday in August. I had no idea when my phone rang in the middle of the night that I’d end up with three different guys at four different points throughout the day, but that’s exactly what happened.

To be honest, on Friday I thought it would only be two. I was having one of those Friday afternoons in which time literally felt stuck. Real work wasn’t passing the time so against my better judgment, I went on OKCupid. This also made me feel that maybe online dating is more than just trying to find a date, maybe it’s just down right addicting. I mean how many of us check Facebook a million times a day for no reason? This is just another site to check out, to cease boredom in and out of the office place.

Anyway, back to me inappropriately being on OKCupid at work. Well I signed in, checked it out and realized I had a phone call! Yikes! I ran to make the phone call, did not sign out of OKCupid and forgot about it. Mid-conversation, and I kid you not, I burst out laughing. Why, you ask? Am I crazy? Well, the woman on the other end of the phone certainty thought so but no, a message came up on the screen from The Musician, “Well, this is the first time I’ve ever seen someone on this site that I knew.”  Oh, the irony. We talked, I told him how I thought it was like the pina colada song, we laughed, we chatted, he yelled at me for not responding quick enough as he thought I was talking to other people but in fact, I was just doing my job and then all of a sudden he wanted to meet up with me for a drink after he gets out of a show around midnight. He couldn’t ask me out before but now that I’m on OKCupid all of a sudden he’s free?? I thought it was sort of bullshit. And then I said, “Sure, sounds good, I’ll most likely be up because I think I have insomnia (seriously I do). I might even be out, call me when you get out of the show.” Ugh… I’m such a pushover. Meanwhile, The Scientist is texting me to make plans for Saturday.

Early Bird Special

Flash forward to 12:30am. No phone call, no text message, no telegram, no messenger pigeon from The Musician. Angry, outraged and determined to once and for all be over The Musician, I went to bed. And I’m actually sleeping which is an anomaly for me these days, when my phone rings at 2:30am. Now, I have this weird thing when my phone rings. It doesn’t matter what time it is, how fast asleep I am, I will pick up the phone and sound like I’ve been awake for hours waiting for this call. After I say “hello,” however, I’m completely confused and incoherent. And this is our conversation:

“Are you awake?” The Musician asks.

“No!!” I grumpily reply back.

“Did I overestimate how late your insomnia would keep you up?” The Musician asks sheepishly.

“Yea.” I say curtly, waking up slowly and remembering my anger I had pre-sleep.

“Oh, sorry, I’ll let you go back to bed.” The Musician says defeated.

“Yeah, OKAY.” I say mad. And then we hang up and I stare at the phone like it’s evil. And then I realize there is no way I’m going back to bed. I call him back. No answer. Ugh, whatever, I think. My phone rings.

“You called?” The Musician asks hopefully.

“Well, NOW I’m up.” I say slightly flirting, slightly pissed off, slightly still asleep.

“Does that mean you want me to come over?”

“I guess” I pretend to say as if it’s a burden for him to come over.

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

And then next thing I know he’s in my bedroom, drunk, talking for 15 minutes straight about some crazy dude he was with all night, sort of a apologizing for not calling on time and just being drunk. With anyone else, I’d be really mad. I didn’t realize how drunk he was on the phone, but damn it, I find him so good looking that I’m having a hard time keeping my hands to myself…

In the morning, or rather a very few hours of sleep later, he’s being all touchy and cuddly in his hung over state. It’s too much really, but I am loving every second of if. Then he has to go and I realize shit, I have to go. So we part, but I tell him he has to take me on a proper date because I don’t want him to get the wrong idea and I laugh, knowing, it’s way too late for that.

The Musician leaves and then I run and get ready for boy number 2. 

Lunch: A First Date with The Scientist

It’s a lunch date in the North End.  I'm kind of nervous considering this is the first person I have ever met online that I've actually said yes to meeting in person. Luckily, it's day out and we're in a public place. Not a great scene for a murder, I think. We meet at Haymarket. I’m 10 minutes late, because I’m always 10 minutes early or 10 minutes late, never on time. I look around as I get to Haymarket, and I try to look for a guy who looks like the pictures I saw online. And then he spots me – thank God I have red hair, it makes this whole let’s meet a stranger thing real easy, I’m usally the only one in sight with bright red hair. We hug, like we know each other and walk to the restaurant. I’m not sure if I’m exhausted, already bored or just distracted by thoughts of The Musician in my bed that morning but before the date even really starts I just want to go home. I know this is unfair so I try and shake my head clear and give him a fair chance.

Lunch is awkward. Mostly because I order a giant plate of chicken, broccoli and zita and pretty much demolish the entire plate. I’m not sure if he was impressed or mortified. We keep up pretty good conversation and after lunch, we walk around in the nice summer weather. I tell him about how I was hit by a car, he tells me about how his front teeth were knocked out from a stupid bicycle accident (and then I feel bad that I was disgusted by his gums which look eternally bruised). We share a lot of useless information and I can tell he’s not ready to end this date so we walk and walk and then when he asks if I want to get a drink, I say yes, even though I still want to go home. He really is a nice guy. We have a drink at a bar and talk some more. And I can tell he’s really into me so I realize it’s really time to go home. We walk back to the T station, he tells me how good a time he had and I neither agree or disagree and proceed to walk home to Cambridge from Haymarket, a good 20-minute walk.

Rating this date on a scale from 1-10 (1 being the worst date I’ve ever been on and 10 being the best), I’d give this date a 5. I’d consider going on a date with him again. I’d probably never consider making out with him.

I get home and as I go to take a nap before my night out, who texts me? The Scientist telling me how great a time he had and that we should hang out soon. Too soon Scientist, too soon. And for all the men out there who probably are NOT reading this, I’m going to give you a piece of advice.

THE RULE OF THREE

If you aren’t sure when to call a girl after you get her number or go on a first date, use the rule of three. Three days is always a good amount of time. One day, let alone one hour, says: “I’m too into you,” immediately putting a girl off. Four or more days says, “I’m just not that into you, even at all.” Three says, “I’m a normal but busy guy. I am definitely interested in you but I also have a life.” Three days is really the perfect amount of time. Two days is only acceptable if you actually think the girl is your soul mate and you don’t want her to slip away. If you aren’t sure, go with three!!

Evening

For my evening, I had a girls night out planned. I was going out with my roommate, her sister and friend. We went to a couple of bars in the Faneuil Hall area because those bars are ridiculous and I can only tolerate them every so often. I can especially tolerate them if I am newly single as I know I’m bound to get hit on and that’s just what you need when you are newly single. My roommate, Erika, her friend Erin and I end up at Sissy K’s (Erika’s sister, engaged and a little bit older is done with these bars a little earlier). At Sissy K’s we proceed to dance our hearts out and get very, very drunk.

While doing this, I get a message from The Musician about how tired he is and I ask him if that means I get to be drunk and wake HIM up at in the middle of the night. Of course, he doesn’t object. I’m then extremely excited and proceed to dance and drink more.

Unexpectedly, I meet a typical Boston guy, who I think is pretty attractive and definitely a lot of fun. But, he’s the typical Boston guy with the accent and is cute but in a meathead kind of way, so I’m judging him a bit, which is mean. We get to talking though and I find out he’s going to Suffolk Law – say what? This guy is going to be a lawyer? I ask him where he went to undergrad – Tufts University. Holy Shit, I think, this kid is smart. And this is why, boys and girls, we should never judge books by their covers. Anyway, we have a really fun time, he asks for my number and tells me he wants to take me to dinner. And despite the fact that he tried to make out with me in the bar before I left (I screamed at him I DON’T DO THAT IN BARS!!! That’s right ladies, you’re never too drunk to know that making out in bars is just not classy), I will go out with him if he calls.

The After Party

And as I left the bar, it was time to bug The Musician as promised. Now, I’m not proud of the next thing I am going to tell you all but it’s something that I must share. I was looking for a cab, drunk – way drunker than anticipated, by myself, in heels. As all the bars were letting out and everyone was going home, a cab wasn’t an easy thing to get. After 20 minutes of searching, I wasn’t sure what to do. It wasn’t even that I couldn’t get to The Musician’s apartment, I couldn’t’ even get to mine. What was I going to do??? Right when I was about to cry like a really bad drunk girl, a pickup truck pulls over. A middle aged Italian man asks in a Boston accent: “Do you need a ride?” Well, yes I thought. I do. But then all the alarms went off in my head – BAD IDEA, KATIE. THIS SCREAMS LAW & ORDER SVU EPISODE. YOU ARE GOING TO GET RAPED AND KILLED IF YOU GET IN THIS CAR.

And then I get in his car, text The Musician if I’m not there in 5 minutes, I’m dead and to call the police. And the guy, who I find out is named Nick, is just a really nice guy and drives me to my destination. He only asks for a cigarette but I don’t have one and we shake hands. And I get out and THANK GOD that I’m alive. I will never hitchhike ever again, however, I can take it off my bucket list, because really who hasn’t wanted to hitchhike at least once in their lives!

I wake The Musician up, say things, I probably shouldn’t say, do things I probably shouldn’t do, and wake up terribly hung over. And somehow, my hangover doesn’t prevent me from sleeping with The Musician. And then afterwards, he plays the piano and it’s amazing. And I feel myself melting and that’s when I know I’m in way over my head.

So, the only way I can come up with to cope with this all is to add more guys to the equation. I need to message more guys on OKCupid and I need to go on dates with other people pronto before I really end up falling for The Musician. I should also probably invest in another hobby that isn’t going on dates with guys, but I’ll take one day at a time.