I haven't been on date in a week! And not because I'm not trying but it's pretty hard to date when A) You are out of the state and B) You return to your city, a city in which a car is absolutely essential, and your car is in the shop.
With all the unfamiliar faces I have been seeing since rejoining the online dating scene, I decided I needed a weekend with people I knew. Because you know..... VIDEO CLIP TIME!!:
It also happened to be Kaitlin's birthday so it was the perfect time to go back and have some fun with mis amigos. It was great to surprise Kaitlin and party with her on her birthday. The added bonus was the drunken make out session I decided to have at the end of her party. I'm not going to get into it because contrary to popular belief, I don't like to put every personal detail of my life into writing on the internet. BUT.... I will say, the last and only other time I had a drunken make out session at a party hosted by Kaitlin (which was on New Year's Eve) it was with the same guy I drunkenly made out with this time. So let your imaginations run wild because that's all I'm saying about that. Plus, I'm too lazy to come up with a creative name for him but just for reference, he's one of The Brofather's bros. I also found out The Brofather reads this pretty regularly sooooo if you're reading today, "Heyyyy Brofather!" :)
So, that explains why I haven't gone on any dates Saturday - Tuesday. And I actually got asked out Wednesday night (for drinks by Adventure Geek!) and Thursday night (for turtle racing with a new guy, name TBD), but since I decided to crash my car into a monster of an SUV before I left for Boston, I am without wheels. Therefore, I'm being held prisoner in Los Feliz until the weekend.
With this short time off from going on actual dates I realized two things:
But nope... I've always hated Valentine's Day - even when I was in a really solid, serious relationship. I am no bandwagon Valentine's Day hater!
So here are my Seven Reasons Why I Hate Valentine's Day (in chronological order):
1. Why do I need to give everyone a Valentine?! Okay, so my hatred obviously goes back to my single-digit years. I just found it really aggravating that I had to give a Valentine to the smelly, ugly kid. Yes, I realize that if the rule "everyone gets a Valentine or don't give them out at all" didn't exist then the smelly, ugly kid would probably not get any Valentines. But, you know, how else is he going to learn? Maybe if he didn't get any Valentines he would think twice about fighting with his Mom about getting into the bath. Besides, here we are teaching our children that no matter what, you will always get a Valentine! Setting them up for ultimate failure for middle & high school when only the good looking popular girls and guys get chocolate roses delivered to them.
2. Chocolate Roses are stupid. During my pre-teen and teen years, my hatred for Valentine's Day only grew when I got my first chocolate rose from my 6th grade "boyfriend". (And I know I said only the good looking and popular people got these but I don't think anyone is really good looking in middle school. I may have been popular but I'm pretty sure it lasted only a couple of weeks or so) I mean the chocolate rose is a stupid candy. It's not enough chocolate to really be that enjoyable and it's not a real rose. Also, it's just an afterthought of a gift that you get the day of Valentine's Day. This sends another terrible message to our kids. With chocolate roses (and the same goes with candy canes at Christmas), we're saying it's okay to give an afterthought of a gift and not only that but everyone will be real excited about it. I don't feel special getting this chocolate rose, buddy, at least 5 other people in my class got one. In fact, I got one from you and a secret admirer. Think outside the box for goodness sake!
3. The pressure it puts on budding relationships. Throughout middle and high school things that shouldn't have happened happened because of stupid Valentine's Day. Back to 6th grade again, I was at a Valentine's Day party on Valentine's Day. And somehow, like all great personal information in middle school, it got out that my boyfriend and I had not had our first kiss. How ridiculous that we were ELEVEN and had not kissed yet! So thanks to our "good" friends, we were pushed into a bathroom and peer pressured into kissing, taking all the magic out of what a first kiss should be. I don't blame my stupid friends, I blame Valentine's Day. From there on out, Valentine's Day became a day of stupid firsts for me -- first time the cooler, older guy I had a crush on called me, the first time an older but not cooler guy expressed interest and of course, the first time a guy had ever told me that he loved me and it was in writing, in a card, and it was completely premature.
4. Romance makes me uncomfortable. Did you ever see that episode of Sex & The City when Carrie faints while dancing outside of Lincoln Center because all of the big gestures, old fashioned romance put on her by The Russian is too much for her? Well, that's kind of how I feel about romance, it makes me want to throw up or pass out or run away screaming. I remember the first time I ever went on a real Valentine's Day date was with my college boyfriend my freshman year. We were in a real serious (looking back, probably too serious) and long distance relationship. So I went up to New York for the weekend where I was taken on this elaborate, expensive date that ended in a horse & carriage ride in Central Park. I wanted to feel all the normal feelings a girl would feel if this happened to her. But I couldn't help feeling uncomfortable and irritated. Where I should have thought, "I'm the luckiest girl in the world", I thought, "This kinds of thing happens in the movies, it should probably stay that way." When I got back from the weekend, my overly romantic roommate couldn't wait to hear all about it and I think I broke her little romantic heart when I didn't gush in excitement and give her a play by play about my Valentine's Day. In fact, I remember her saying, "Wow.... you're not romantic at all are you?" No... and it's not something I think I will grow into.
5. Cards should NOT be treated as a substitution for your own words. And this just doesn't go for Valentine's Day but for all times you buy a card. Any time I give a card to someone you will not find it without a long or short note on the blank part of the card. Why else would it be there?! Yes, sometimes cards say exactly what you want to say but you can't just leave it there and sign your name. You know why? Because you didn't write the card. It's not your original thought. So if you aren't going to write me a sentence or two with your own original thought, save yourself the three bucks and don't get me a card at all. And it was on Valentine's Day with The Ex that I discovered this is how I felt. He got me a card, signed, "Love, The Ex" and it was a complete disappointment. And if you go to back to number 3, when my high school boyfriend gave me a card to tell me he loved me, he at least wrote in his own words, he did not let the card say it. Although I faulted him for prematurely telling me he loved me, I do give him credit for writing his feelings. Incredible that a 15 year old could figure out how to write a sentence on a card but a 25 year old could not! GAH!
6. When you are single on Valentine's Day, coupled people think you're going to kill yourself. If I haven't attempted to kill myself the other 364 days of the year (or 365 when it's a leap year) because I'm single, I'm probably not going to kill myself on Valentine's Day. So, please, relax. And please don't set me up. Thank you.
7. Who the fuck is Saint Valentine and what the hell does he have to do with love? Please take a moment to google St. Valentine. Here's what we know about him: He was a priest who stood up for his beliefs and these beliefs pissed off Emperor Claudius II, so Valentine was beaten with clubs, beheaded and executed on February 14th. Knowing that, don't we all find it weird when we say, "Do you want to be my Valentine?" Ummmm not if it ends with me being beaten and beheaded! And does Saint Valentine have anything to do with love? NO. Although some people tried to back pedal and say, "Oh yeah, he totally married people against the wishes of the emperor...." but there's no evidence of that. And basically, his death was just used to get rid of some pagan tradition and instead of celebrating some goddess or something we celebrate Saint Valentine. I think I could be more on board with this holiday if it was just called "Love Day" and we left Saint Valentine and his tragic death out of it.
And that's why I hate Valentine's Day. And that's why I say, No dates? No Valentines? No worries. Because this Valentine's Day, you will find me with friends taking advantage of the cheap champagne special at The Cat & Fiddle.
With all the unfamiliar faces I have been seeing since rejoining the online dating scene, I decided I needed a weekend with people I knew. Because you know..... VIDEO CLIP TIME!!:
It also happened to be Kaitlin's birthday so it was the perfect time to go back and have some fun with mis amigos. It was great to surprise Kaitlin and party with her on her birthday. The added bonus was the drunken make out session I decided to have at the end of her party. I'm not going to get into it because contrary to popular belief, I don't like to put every personal detail of my life into writing on the internet. BUT.... I will say, the last and only other time I had a drunken make out session at a party hosted by Kaitlin (which was on New Year's Eve) it was with the same guy I drunkenly made out with this time. So let your imaginations run wild because that's all I'm saying about that. Plus, I'm too lazy to come up with a creative name for him but just for reference, he's one of The Brofather's bros. I also found out The Brofather reads this pretty regularly sooooo if you're reading today, "Heyyyy Brofather!" :)
So, that explains why I haven't gone on any dates Saturday - Tuesday. And I actually got asked out Wednesday night (for drinks by Adventure Geek!) and Thursday night (for turtle racing with a new guy, name TBD), but since I decided to crash my car into a monster of an SUV before I left for Boston, I am without wheels. Therefore, I'm being held prisoner in Los Feliz until the weekend.
With this short time off from going on actual dates I realized two things:
- Our time together in coming to an end. My first date was on January 21st and I said I was only going to bring back Point. Click. Date. for one month and one month only. I stand by that and February 21st is only a week and a half away! I know.... I'll give you a moment to cry about it a little bit. Cue the sad music....VIDEO CLIP TIME:
- In exactly 5 days it's VALENTINE'S DAY.
But nope... I've always hated Valentine's Day - even when I was in a really solid, serious relationship. I am no bandwagon Valentine's Day hater!
So here are my Seven Reasons Why I Hate Valentine's Day (in chronological order):
1. Why do I need to give everyone a Valentine?! Okay, so my hatred obviously goes back to my single-digit years. I just found it really aggravating that I had to give a Valentine to the smelly, ugly kid. Yes, I realize that if the rule "everyone gets a Valentine or don't give them out at all" didn't exist then the smelly, ugly kid would probably not get any Valentines. But, you know, how else is he going to learn? Maybe if he didn't get any Valentines he would think twice about fighting with his Mom about getting into the bath. Besides, here we are teaching our children that no matter what, you will always get a Valentine! Setting them up for ultimate failure for middle & high school when only the good looking popular girls and guys get chocolate roses delivered to them.
3. The pressure it puts on budding relationships. Throughout middle and high school things that shouldn't have happened happened because of stupid Valentine's Day. Back to 6th grade again, I was at a Valentine's Day party on Valentine's Day. And somehow, like all great personal information in middle school, it got out that my boyfriend and I had not had our first kiss. How ridiculous that we were ELEVEN and had not kissed yet! So thanks to our "good" friends, we were pushed into a bathroom and peer pressured into kissing, taking all the magic out of what a first kiss should be. I don't blame my stupid friends, I blame Valentine's Day. From there on out, Valentine's Day became a day of stupid firsts for me -- first time the cooler, older guy I had a crush on called me, the first time an older but not cooler guy expressed interest and of course, the first time a guy had ever told me that he loved me and it was in writing, in a card, and it was completely premature.
4. Romance makes me uncomfortable. Did you ever see that episode of Sex & The City when Carrie faints while dancing outside of Lincoln Center because all of the big gestures, old fashioned romance put on her by The Russian is too much for her? Well, that's kind of how I feel about romance, it makes me want to throw up or pass out or run away screaming. I remember the first time I ever went on a real Valentine's Day date was with my college boyfriend my freshman year. We were in a real serious (looking back, probably too serious) and long distance relationship. So I went up to New York for the weekend where I was taken on this elaborate, expensive date that ended in a horse & carriage ride in Central Park. I wanted to feel all the normal feelings a girl would feel if this happened to her. But I couldn't help feeling uncomfortable and irritated. Where I should have thought, "I'm the luckiest girl in the world", I thought, "This kinds of thing happens in the movies, it should probably stay that way." When I got back from the weekend, my overly romantic roommate couldn't wait to hear all about it and I think I broke her little romantic heart when I didn't gush in excitement and give her a play by play about my Valentine's Day. In fact, I remember her saying, "Wow.... you're not romantic at all are you?" No... and it's not something I think I will grow into.
5. Cards should NOT be treated as a substitution for your own words. And this just doesn't go for Valentine's Day but for all times you buy a card. Any time I give a card to someone you will not find it without a long or short note on the blank part of the card. Why else would it be there?! Yes, sometimes cards say exactly what you want to say but you can't just leave it there and sign your name. You know why? Because you didn't write the card. It's not your original thought. So if you aren't going to write me a sentence or two with your own original thought, save yourself the three bucks and don't get me a card at all. And it was on Valentine's Day with The Ex that I discovered this is how I felt. He got me a card, signed, "Love, The Ex" and it was a complete disappointment. And if you go to back to number 3, when my high school boyfriend gave me a card to tell me he loved me, he at least wrote in his own words, he did not let the card say it. Although I faulted him for prematurely telling me he loved me, I do give him credit for writing his feelings. Incredible that a 15 year old could figure out how to write a sentence on a card but a 25 year old could not! GAH!
6. When you are single on Valentine's Day, coupled people think you're going to kill yourself. If I haven't attempted to kill myself the other 364 days of the year (or 365 when it's a leap year) because I'm single, I'm probably not going to kill myself on Valentine's Day. So, please, relax. And please don't set me up. Thank you.
7. Who the fuck is Saint Valentine and what the hell does he have to do with love? Please take a moment to google St. Valentine. Here's what we know about him: He was a priest who stood up for his beliefs and these beliefs pissed off Emperor Claudius II, so Valentine was beaten with clubs, beheaded and executed on February 14th. Knowing that, don't we all find it weird when we say, "Do you want to be my Valentine?" Ummmm not if it ends with me being beaten and beheaded! And does Saint Valentine have anything to do with love? NO. Although some people tried to back pedal and say, "Oh yeah, he totally married people against the wishes of the emperor...." but there's no evidence of that. And basically, his death was just used to get rid of some pagan tradition and instead of celebrating some goddess or something we celebrate Saint Valentine. I think I could be more on board with this holiday if it was just called "Love Day" and we left Saint Valentine and his tragic death out of it.
And that's why I hate Valentine's Day. And that's why I say, No dates? No Valentines? No worries. Because this Valentine's Day, you will find me with friends taking advantage of the cheap champagne special at The Cat & Fiddle.
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| When I found this image, I laughed for a good 5 minutes. |
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