When a guy admits to being skinny on his online dating profile this means he's one of those weird individuals who can't gain weight no matter how hard they try. And if that's not your thing, you should probably steer clear. Super skinny guys are not my thing. Call me crazy, but I just don't like a guy who if he tried on my clothes not only would they fit but they might be a bit baggy on him. So when I walked in to Chi Dynasty in Los Feliz Friday night, I kind of felt like I was in middle school because that's the last time I remember being bigger than a guy. To be fair, he was a bit taller than me. I had shoes that brought me up to about 5'5"-5'6"and he was MAYBE 2 inches taller than me. But he was definitely 10-20 pounds lighter than me - and I'm not a big girl, so I wondered if he had an eating disorder. This is LA after all.
Trying not to let my shallowness get in the way of a perfectly good evening, we sat down for some Chinese food. I was so excited to get my normal pork fried rice, General Tso's chicken and egg roll! But then.... he suggested all these other things because he knows the owner and he goes there a lot. And we ended up splitting dishes that were just okay. Ugh...... so my craving for Chinese food remains.
And then on to the conversation. I'm not sure when it was ever okay to use the word "homie" by anyone but I definitely know a tiny, white guy who grew up in Austin should never utter that word in the year 2012. And that is why I'm calling him DJ Skinny. Even if he didn't tell me that he made hip hop beats in his spare time, it was very clear by the way he talked. The only way to describe the way he talked is by VIDEO CLIP TIME (Note: DJ Skinny did not dress or talk offensively, in fact he was very respectful but other than that, this is pretty much the way he talked):
Ooooh Seth Green what a terrible career choice.
Anyway, the conversation was fine but at the end of the meal I was more than ready to call it a night. And that's when he asked if I wanted to get a drink. And stupid me said, "Sure.... why not?" We went across the street to Drawing Room which is the diviest of dive bars. On the walk over I learned two things: 1. He's half-Jewish and 2. He had a bit of a swagger when he walked. Yep, this 5'7", 110 pound, half-Jewish guy had a swagger? Why? WHY?!
Drawing Room was really packed and it was full of hipsters. I could tell DJ Skinny was made nervous by all the flannel, thick rimmed glasses and facial hair. But, we stayed for a drink and that's when he decided to tell me about his new apartment. It's a lovely studio in Hollywood and he has set up his turntables, computers (he has 5....?) and his sleeping bag. Yeah...a sleeping bag. I'm not into skinnier-than-me guys and I'm also not into guys who don't own a bed and I'm not going to apologize for that. After this fun fact was learned, I downed the rest of Corona and was ready to go home.
With an awkward goodbye, I thanked him for dinner and pretended that we should do this again sometime.
Also, I knew going into this date that he is "going through a divorce." At least that's what his profile said. He only brought up his ex-wife a couple of times so I'm not sure if the divorce is finalized or not but I'm assuming if he doesn't own a bed the divorce is pretty new.
DJ Skinny meant well, he really did. Unfortunately, his odd combination of hip-hop talking, swagger walking, sleeping bag sleeping, needs to eat a sandwich or 20 build was just not doing it for me. But I'm sure he'll make someone very happy some day.
One date down... many to go. DJ Skinny set the bar low, let's just hope no one lowers it!
Trying not to let my shallowness get in the way of a perfectly good evening, we sat down for some Chinese food. I was so excited to get my normal pork fried rice, General Tso's chicken and egg roll! But then.... he suggested all these other things because he knows the owner and he goes there a lot. And we ended up splitting dishes that were just okay. Ugh...... so my craving for Chinese food remains.
And then on to the conversation. I'm not sure when it was ever okay to use the word "homie" by anyone but I definitely know a tiny, white guy who grew up in Austin should never utter that word in the year 2012. And that is why I'm calling him DJ Skinny. Even if he didn't tell me that he made hip hop beats in his spare time, it was very clear by the way he talked. The only way to describe the way he talked is by VIDEO CLIP TIME (Note: DJ Skinny did not dress or talk offensively, in fact he was very respectful but other than that, this is pretty much the way he talked):
Ooooh Seth Green what a terrible career choice.
Anyway, the conversation was fine but at the end of the meal I was more than ready to call it a night. And that's when he asked if I wanted to get a drink. And stupid me said, "Sure.... why not?" We went across the street to Drawing Room which is the diviest of dive bars. On the walk over I learned two things: 1. He's half-Jewish and 2. He had a bit of a swagger when he walked. Yep, this 5'7", 110 pound, half-Jewish guy had a swagger? Why? WHY?!
Drawing Room was really packed and it was full of hipsters. I could tell DJ Skinny was made nervous by all the flannel, thick rimmed glasses and facial hair. But, we stayed for a drink and that's when he decided to tell me about his new apartment. It's a lovely studio in Hollywood and he has set up his turntables, computers (he has 5....?) and his sleeping bag. Yeah...a sleeping bag. I'm not into skinnier-than-me guys and I'm also not into guys who don't own a bed and I'm not going to apologize for that. After this fun fact was learned, I downed the rest of Corona and was ready to go home.
With an awkward goodbye, I thanked him for dinner and pretended that we should do this again sometime.
Also, I knew going into this date that he is "going through a divorce." At least that's what his profile said. He only brought up his ex-wife a couple of times so I'm not sure if the divorce is finalized or not but I'm assuming if he doesn't own a bed the divorce is pretty new.
DJ Skinny meant well, he really did. Unfortunately, his odd combination of hip-hop talking, swagger walking, sleeping bag sleeping, needs to eat a sandwich or 20 build was just not doing it for me. But I'm sure he'll make someone very happy some day.
One date down... many to go. DJ Skinny set the bar low, let's just hope no one lowers it!
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