Last entry, I introduced the phrase “bad life decision.” Well, this seems to be the phase I’m going through in my life right now. You might have noticed this already, however, like when I let The Musician come over in the middle of the night or when I not only went over to the The Musician’s in the middle of the night but I HITCHHIKED. Yea. I’m not making good life decisions, but I can say that I'm having a hell of a lot of fun. And as my wise friend Kaitlin told me “if you never make a bad decision you're super boring, and no one wants to be boring! So here's to being interesting!” Cheers, Kaitlin, Cheers.
So, I ended with the last entry with a “teaser.” Drunk at 11:00pm, I thought it was a good idea to call The Ex-Boyfriend. Well, he didn’t pick up, PHEW.
Of course, that’s not where the story ends. He calls me the next night while I’m in the movies. He’s been in California, interviewing for jobs. I get the voicemail after I get out of the movie and THANK GOD I was with Kaitlin. If I had been on a date, this would have been super awkward. I listen to the message and he tells me he got a job and is moving to California. And all of a sudden, I’m not okay. And then, I’m crying. And then, I need wine. I don’t know what came over me but I couldn’t handle the idea of him being across the country. I talked to my friend, Liz, the next day and she made sense of it for me. There is a comfort in having him nearby – even if I never hang out with him, I can if I want! Having him in California, I can’t see him on a whim. Also, it finalizes the breakup. When he leaves, it’s over, for good. It slams the last 2.5 years of my life shut.
We played a great game of phone tag and then the next day after I was full of brunch and mimosas, he calls me. We catch up. I tell him how my class went (I’m taking a class! I thought it would help with my boy obsession – it’s not helping, at least not yet but I’ve only had 2 classes) and he told me about his job. And we made plans to hang out later in the week when he was back.
About a half hour later, he calls me back asking for an odd request. My heart sinks into my stomach and I have no idea what he is going to ask. He asks if he can stay over sometime in the week. I immediately don’t know what to say. Something inside me is like OF COURSE but the rational part is like FUCK YOU. I tell him I have to think about it and for him to call me when he gets back.
He took this very literally. He called me at 7:45am when he landed. And he asks me not only if he can sleepover that night but the entire week. And when he asks again, if he can sleepover that at least tonight, one night, I say: I guess. Because that’s what I say when I mean yes but know that I should say no….
And he does sleep over that night, which is Monday. And he sleeps over Tuesday and Thursday. And all I am going to say about it is: Why the hell is post-breakup sex SO amazing? Yeah. So, I had a pretty good Monday, Tuesday and Thursday.
And the only way I can explain my bad life decision is really lame –especially because this will be my SECOND Sex & the City reference – but here I go:
My whole relationship with The Ex-Boy Friend has been breaking up and then coming back together. And all I can compare it to is…. Get ready here is the lameness that is me: Carrie and Big. But, I'm serious. No matter how many times Big is an asshole she ALWAYS goes back to him, and you sit there shouting at the damn TV "ARE YOU AN IDIOT CARRIE BRADSHAW?" And she is, and so am I, but we have the inability to say no to this one guy... Well, in Sex & the City, Big moves to Nappa – VIDEO CLIP TIME:
Anyway, I guess this is the part when The Ex-Boyfriend moves to California. So, maybe this means I'll meet a really old Russian man and fall in love. But, don't worry I don't think I'll move to Paris and have to be rescued by The Ex. That's just silly.
In reality, I know that sleeping with him this last week is just my way of saying goodbye for good. When he leaves for CA, it’s over, it’s done. Besides, it's pretty hard to keep accidentally hooking up and dragging things on when someone is across the country, 3 hours behind you... The Ex-Boyfriend will literally and figuratively be in the past.
That’s if he actually goes. It’s a week later when I’m writing all of this and well he hasn’t gotten the official offer. Sigh.
To back track a bit, the Musician had a party. I acted very awkward because we hadn’t seen each other in 10 days and in the last 4 days I’d been busy or at least getting busy with The Ex. I didn’t even know if he was still interested even though I did get an invite to his party. When my friends were leaving, I straight up asked him: Do you want me to stay? And when he said yes, I stayed. And drank. A LOT. And slept over, and stuff happened, and we got brunch the next day. And he holds my hand and it’s cute.
And then that night I go on a date with The Ex. And I wake up the next morning in a terrible mood. Extremely ready to tell The Ex AND The Musician that I want nothing to do with him. Neither of these relationships are good decisions or going anywhere. What the hell is ht point?? Instead, I ask The Musician to hang out with me. And he comes over, we hang out and asks if he’s allowed to sleep over (if one more guy asks me to sleep over, I swear). And he sleeps over, however, he doesn’t even attempt to kiss me. Not ONE physical thing happens between the two of us. Leaving me confused, a bit ticked off and did I mention confused. Did he really think I just wanted to hang out and talk? What does he want? I've been drinking wine while writing this entry, should I call him and ask?
Boys, bad life decisions – too bad it’s not lent or that I'm a practicing Catholic, I really need to give both up for AT LEAST 40 days.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Drinks with The Artist
Remember I messaged The Artist? He drew giraffes, I thought he cute, I was being proactive and then he messaged me back? Well, I mentioned him in the 3rd entry – go back and reread if you don’t remember.
So, all this time while I was having a lot of fun making bad life decisions like hitchhiking, sleeping with The Musician without having a real date(oh yeah it happened again, we haven’t gone an official date yet, this is considered a BAD LIFE DECISION) and getting stalked by The Scientist - through all that - The Artist and I have been messaging back and forth. For a while, I really thought that we would just be OKCupid message pals forever. I mean everyone else on this site was very forward asking for numbers, giving me a number, asking if I wanted to a get a drink in the first message and today, I even got a message asking if I’d be interested in an “adult romp” this weekend. So, sending long messages back and forth with The Artist was definitely different. That being said, he seemed like a nice, decent guy (and hey, his photos aren’t so bad either) so when he finally asked to meet up, I was obviously in!
We decided to meet up in Central Square at 7pm for drinks. I thought this was smart keeping it casual, if I wanted to bail after one drink I totally could have! So, I’m 10 minutes late AGAIN, really I don’t know what my problem is. When I see him for the first time I giggle to myself because he wore a skinny little tie! Super adorable. This time no hug like we know each other because that’s actually weird. He buys me my first drink (so far, so good) and we sit down and chat it up. And he’s nice and kind of cute but man, he’s awkward. No, that’s not fair to say because HE'S trying harder than ME to keep the conversation flowing and moving forward. All I can think he’s a SUPER GEEK. In fact, he reminds me a little of Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory. For those of you who aren't familiar with this show:
And just like Sheldon, even though he’s a super nerd, you like him because he’s quirky and funny. And The Artist isn’t laugh out loud funny but just like in the clip above, he comes out of left field with his topics. For example, we were at an awkward pause in conversation when he says, “So, my sister is dating a Private Eye.” First of all this is the coolest thing I’ve ever heard. I want to be a Private Eye! How do you get to become a Private Eye? Do you go to school to become a Private Eye? Apparently, his sister’s boyfriend just showed up at an office and trained to become one. SO COOL. New life goal: Become a Private Eye.
The Artist then goes on to tell me all about his sister. In fact, I think I left knowing more about his sister than him. But seriously, I want to be his sister’s friend, she sounds super cool. She was an amazing dancer and got into an awesome dance program but THEN tragically her legs or knees or her shins or something started to bother her. She rested, thought it would get better but ALAS!! This problem did NOT go away! And now she will never have a career as a dancer! She was left with crushed dreams, an unknown future and aching limbs! But she perseveres! She starts to go to school somewhere else and now has a NEW dream! To be come an archeologist! And now she’s dating a Private I. What a cool chick. Not really sure why The Artist is such a nerd.
He’s such a nerd in fact, that I decide we need to change locations and what better place to go but to the Miracle of Science Bar. With a periodic table in the background, I seem to not care as much about his nerdiness. Or maybe I'm getting a bit tipsy.
And he buys my 3rd drink and as I finish the last few sip, I realize I'm drunk - not that I can tolerate my alcohol anyway, but to my credit, I had a small salad for dinner and a few pumpernickel pretzels. I'm not just drunk but I'm starving! And I wonder, am I just drunk or does he give off an incredible gay vibe??? Oh brother, it’s not even 11pm, I’m drunk and now he seems a little gay to me. I decide to make a good life decision (you know to switch it up), tell him I’m tired and go home.
On the walk to the train station, he hits me with another random but hilarious fact: If I have a child who is a hemophiliac, I may get a book with his drawings in it. Ooooh Artist, you’re such a quirky, silly nerd with a splash of gay thrown in!
We do the awkward hug, he thanks me for coming out and we part ways. And guess what? THREE DAYS later he messages me. Too bad he gives me a nerdy, gay vibe because the boy at least knows how to play by the rules. But, since he’s playing by the rules, I let him know I’m busy but to call me in a week when things are less hectic. All and all it was okay time and thank God he's not giving the stalker vibe. Really, I'm not sure I can handle another stalker quite yet.
THE EX-BOYFRIEND.
Stay tuned…
Saturday, September 11, 2010
From Scientist to Stalker in One Too Many Texts
Let’s recap a bit shall we? The Scientist and I went on ONE date and ONE date only. I had a mediocre time but thought maybe I’d give him a second chance. Upon arriving home after our date - meaning within the hour after our date was over – he texts me (TEXT NUMBER ONE) telling me how great a time he had and that we should hang out soon. “Soon” – this is the red flag that I ignored. Now I will give you a play by play of the text messages he sent after this day (The date and the “soon” text message were on a Saturday):
SUNDAY: He behaves himself and doesn’t contact me on Sunday.
MONDAY: I told him I was moving on Monday. Mid-afternoon he sends me TEXT NUMBER TWO, asking me how my move went. Well, since I wasn’t moving that evening, it hasn’t happened yet, I tell him this. Later that evening, TEXT NUMBER THREE, how did the move go?? I ignore it.
TUESDAY: I’m sick, running around buying paint and moving the last piece of furniture into my apartment. TEXT NUMBER FOUR: Are you done moving? Do you want to hang out? I tell him I’m sick, I won’t be done getting my apartment set up until Thursday and then I go away Friday so I’m not sure I’ll be around until the following week. He sends me a text back - TEXT NUMBER FIVE- asking when I’ll be home. Not until Tuesday, I lie.
WEDNESDAY: TEXT NUMBER SIX – asking me how the painting is going. Seriously, Scientist, I’m starting not to be able to breathe.
THURSDAY: TEXT NUMBER SEVEN – asking me how work is. VOICEMAIL at 5:15PM “Hey Katie, What’s up, it’s me (it’s me?? Yes, I know my phone tells me it’s you but I don’t know you well enough for you to say “it’s me – this really bothers me, probably more than it should). I was just wondering what you are up to, seeing if you are still sick and if you’re done moving and everything. I duno. Mumble,mumble. Hope work went well today, give me a call when you get this.” Later that evening, maybe an hour or so later, TEXT NUMBER EIGHT: What’s up? He calls AGAIN around 10pm that I get when I’m out at a gallery show opening with The Musician and my friend Kaitlin. Although it’s rude to The Musician, I shove my phone in Kaitlin’s face and scream STALKER. She laughs – not funny Kaitlin! Ok, yeah, it is pretty funny.
FRIDAY: I’m officially away in Milwaukee. He sends me TEXT NUMBER NINE AND TEN. One is a picture of some fat lady at a concert that everyone is staring in horror at. The other is apologizing; he meant to send that to someone else. YEA maybe if you didn’t text me so much you wouldn’t have by accidently sent this inappropriate photo to me. I don’t text him that, I just ignore him.
SATURDAY – MONDAY: FREEDOM
TUEDAY: 8:15AM TEXT NUMBER ELEVEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, those many exclamations points are necessary. If I told him I was coming back from Milwaukee on Tuesday, why the FUCK (Yes, this fuck is necessary) would I be home at 8:15am?? That means my flight would have been at 5:15am. Hello? Common sense anyone? The fact that I actually came in the night before, have the day off and I’m SLEEPING IN, this pisses me off even MORE that he’s texting me at 8:15AM!!! Congratulations, Scientist, you have just been promoted to STALKER. So, the text message says: Hey. Are u back? How was your trip? I wake up to this stupid text message, throw my phone across my room and go back to bed.
10:09 AM: TEXT NUMBER TWELVE: “Ok well I guess you’re ignoring me. I had a good time with you I thought you did too but if you don’t want to see me again that’s fine but that’s a pretty immature way of sending a message.”
All I can say is WOW, get confused why he doesn’t use any punctuation and then copy and paste this into an email to Kaitlin. I want to just ignore him but I have to let him know how much of a crazy person he is. Therefore, 40 minutes later at 10:49am, I respond: “Wow. I’m still away [LIE]. I told you I’d talk to you when I got back. But all your texts are a little much and I think it’d be best if we didn’t hang out again.”
He responds pretty much less than a minute later, TEXT NUMBER THIRTEEN “Hmm sorry I’m just a little insecure… [Really? I hadn’t noticed at all thanks for clearing that up Stalker] all I sent were 3 texts [3? Try 12, 13 if you count this one] but hadn’t heard back in 5 days… ok if u feel that way
And just like that my first OKCupid inspired relationship is over. And you think that’s where it would end right?? Well, this morning (2 weeks after the first date) I log in to OKCupid find a message from The Stalker sent late Friday night (3 days after the thirteenth text)! Seriously, people, I could not make this shit up!
“hey I’m not usually the person who first admits they’re wrong but I’m sorry for acting like such a psycho I don’t blame you for not wanting to see me again after I sent you that crazy text. It’s a long story but my ex left me with some serious trust issues. I shouldn’t have let it get to me and done this to you.”
I’m not sure what my favorite part of this message is. Is it the fact that he admits he was a psycho? Is it the fact he still isn’t using punctuation? Or is it the part where he tells me he has trust issues? I think it may be the trust issues part because what does his trust issues have to do with me? We went on A date, ONE date. UNO. UN. Did he think that meant that we were exclusive? And that we needed to talk every day and that my not responding his every dumb text message was me betraying his trust?!? If so, that’s hilarious.
All I can say, is I’m glad he knows he’s crazy. Unfortunately, I don’t have time for crazy.
SUNDAY: He behaves himself and doesn’t contact me on Sunday.
MONDAY: I told him I was moving on Monday. Mid-afternoon he sends me TEXT NUMBER TWO, asking me how my move went. Well, since I wasn’t moving that evening, it hasn’t happened yet, I tell him this. Later that evening, TEXT NUMBER THREE, how did the move go?? I ignore it.
TUESDAY: I’m sick, running around buying paint and moving the last piece of furniture into my apartment. TEXT NUMBER FOUR: Are you done moving? Do you want to hang out? I tell him I’m sick, I won’t be done getting my apartment set up until Thursday and then I go away Friday so I’m not sure I’ll be around until the following week. He sends me a text back - TEXT NUMBER FIVE- asking when I’ll be home. Not until Tuesday, I lie.
WEDNESDAY: TEXT NUMBER SIX – asking me how the painting is going. Seriously, Scientist, I’m starting not to be able to breathe.
THURSDAY: TEXT NUMBER SEVEN – asking me how work is. VOICEMAIL at 5:15PM “Hey Katie, What’s up, it’s me (it’s me?? Yes, I know my phone tells me it’s you but I don’t know you well enough for you to say “it’s me – this really bothers me, probably more than it should). I was just wondering what you are up to, seeing if you are still sick and if you’re done moving and everything. I duno. Mumble,mumble. Hope work went well today, give me a call when you get this.” Later that evening, maybe an hour or so later, TEXT NUMBER EIGHT: What’s up? He calls AGAIN around 10pm that I get when I’m out at a gallery show opening with The Musician and my friend Kaitlin. Although it’s rude to The Musician, I shove my phone in Kaitlin’s face and scream STALKER. She laughs – not funny Kaitlin! Ok, yeah, it is pretty funny.
FRIDAY: I’m officially away in Milwaukee. He sends me TEXT NUMBER NINE AND TEN. One is a picture of some fat lady at a concert that everyone is staring in horror at. The other is apologizing; he meant to send that to someone else. YEA maybe if you didn’t text me so much you wouldn’t have by accidently sent this inappropriate photo to me. I don’t text him that, I just ignore him.
SATURDAY – MONDAY: FREEDOM
TUEDAY: 8:15AM TEXT NUMBER ELEVEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, those many exclamations points are necessary. If I told him I was coming back from Milwaukee on Tuesday, why the FUCK (Yes, this fuck is necessary) would I be home at 8:15am?? That means my flight would have been at 5:15am. Hello? Common sense anyone? The fact that I actually came in the night before, have the day off and I’m SLEEPING IN, this pisses me off even MORE that he’s texting me at 8:15AM!!! Congratulations, Scientist, you have just been promoted to STALKER. So, the text message says: Hey. Are u back? How was your trip? I wake up to this stupid text message, throw my phone across my room and go back to bed.
10:09 AM: TEXT NUMBER TWELVE: “Ok well I guess you’re ignoring me. I had a good time with you I thought you did too but if you don’t want to see me again that’s fine but that’s a pretty immature way of sending a message.”
All I can say is WOW, get confused why he doesn’t use any punctuation and then copy and paste this into an email to Kaitlin. I want to just ignore him but I have to let him know how much of a crazy person he is. Therefore, 40 minutes later at 10:49am, I respond: “Wow. I’m still away [LIE]. I told you I’d talk to you when I got back. But all your texts are a little much and I think it’d be best if we didn’t hang out again.”
He responds pretty much less than a minute later, TEXT NUMBER THIRTEEN “Hmm sorry I’m just a little insecure… [Really? I hadn’t noticed at all thanks for clearing that up Stalker] all I sent were 3 texts [3? Try 12, 13 if you count this one] but hadn’t heard back in 5 days… ok if u feel that way
And just like that my first OKCupid inspired relationship is over. And you think that’s where it would end right?? Well, this morning (2 weeks after the first date) I log in to OKCupid find a message from The Stalker sent late Friday night (3 days after the thirteenth text)! Seriously, people, I could not make this shit up!
“hey I’m not usually the person who first admits they’re wrong but I’m sorry for acting like such a psycho I don’t blame you for not wanting to see me again after I sent you that crazy text. It’s a long story but my ex left me with some serious trust issues. I shouldn’t have let it get to me and done this to you.”
I’m not sure what my favorite part of this message is. Is it the fact that he admits he was a psycho? Is it the fact he still isn’t using punctuation? Or is it the part where he tells me he has trust issues? I think it may be the trust issues part because what does his trust issues have to do with me? We went on A date, ONE date. UNO. UN. Did he think that meant that we were exclusive? And that we needed to talk every day and that my not responding his every dumb text message was me betraying his trust?!? If so, that’s hilarious.
All I can say, is I’m glad he knows he’s crazy. Unfortunately, I don’t have time for crazy.
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